What do I do?

What would you do if your mate told you that it's over for no apparent reason? That's the situation I am in now; sounds like an irresolvable plight. My girlfriend just broke up with me last weekend for no reason. I'm still in shock. We met and went out for about 4 months. It hurts because I fell in love with her. We were so compatible; it was like she knew what I would say before I even said it. We felt each other's vibes. She was 3 days older than me(Nov.10 and I was born Nov.13). I still care about her, cherish, and love her. Besides having slept with married men and had one-night stands, she has had three different serious relationships. She told me that two of the relationships, she fell in love so hard and lost love so hard. She also admitted that none of her ex's treated her the way I was treating her; that I was the perfect guy and type with whom she would spend the rest of her life. The first time we met, she seduced me and we got intimate. And she said afterwards that she hoped that I would be with her and I responded, "me too". Since then, I've got to know her a little bit more and discovered that she's so wonderful and then, I fell in love. She actually got me to fall for her because she drew me closer to herself with so much passion, affection, kindness, romance and every other good thing that comes along in a relationship. Now, I moved in to my parents place because I had a slight problem with my elder sister with whom I was leaving previously. She asked me to move out in August 17, 2002 and then, I told my ex. girlfriend that I'm gonna move in to my parents place for about two months and then, find my own place and move out again so that we could celebrate our birthdays together in November. We both cried together as I was telling her this because she got emotional, which got me emotional as well. And then, she said that she doesn't know if she is gonna be able to handle it; not being able to call me anytime she wants, spend the weekend with me, do anything she wants with me. I said to her that being with my parents is temporary; just for two months, and that's it. Then, we could be together forever and as long as she wanted. And of course, she leaves with this family she's working for as a nanny here in New York(she's originally from Greenfalls, Montana) Meanwhile, before all this started happening, she has had some phone calls from one or two guys that I don't know. On two occasions, One asked her to come to downtown Manhattan and have a drink with him. She told me that the guy has been her friend and she's never seen him for five years, but he lives in California and comes to New York for business ventures. She never honored the two invitations, anyway, because each of the times the guy called her, we had already made plans to hang-out or do something fun together.
Now, she broke up with me, telling me that she needs to figure out herself and find out what exactly is wrong with her and why she's not fallen the way I have fallen for her. I mean this is someone who tells me from the beginning that she wants me, wants to be with me, can't get me out of her head, that I'm perfect and we're wonderful together. She called her friend in Montana and told her that we broke up, contrary to what she told me. She said to me that she needs a break to figure herself out. I think those two terms have different meanings. When you break up with your mate, you actually do that on a bad note; maybe, he or she cheated on the other, or they had arguments and so on. But it wasn't the case with us. I asked her the following day after the break up what she told her friend. She said that she told her we broke up, but "it wasn't what you said to me," I uttered in response. She said they both mean the same thing. Maybe, you or anyother person who reads my letter could clarify those terms for me. I wrote her a poem though, saying that I want her back, that I'm willing to start all over again as friends and take it slowly. She wrote me back and said, "you're making me feel guilty and bad again, that nothing has changed and I shouldn't beg her back. She told me during our break-up conversation that she cared about me so much, and that she feels like she's hurting me since she has not yet felt the same way I feel about her. I don't even know what to think anymore as the reason why she jilted me like this. If she said that I treated her way better than her previous ex-boyfriends, then, why wouldn't she just give it a chance and just open her heart to me.
Maybe, she would eventually find something about me that would make her fall in love with me. All she could say in her last email to me was, "Peter, I've been where you're right now and so, you'll be fine; I promise." That's not enough!! We're talking about someone’s feelings here. I have not slept nor eaten for the past five days now. I just feel like I'm going to get a heart attack or die. I still care about and love her, and no other woman would be able to make me feel the way she made me feel, which is the reason why I fell in love with her. I don't know what to do. She once said to me that she came to New York, hoping that she would have fun in New York, go to places, clubs, parties and so on. I promised her that we would be doing that as soon as I move out of my parents' house(only a few months away). She wouldn't be patient for me and yet, she claims that she cares about me. I'm guessing she’s already found another guy or she’s going to find one to do those things with or, she would start going to night clubs and hooking up with guys; you know, like to start having one-night stands again. Please publish my letter so that my fellow guys and men who have been through this situation would understand my plight and perhaps, offer some advice. You can also suggest to me what to do please. I still want her back in my life. To everyone that will take time to read my letter and give me some advice, I say thanks. I’d really appreciate it.

Peter
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