Feel I am destined to be miserable

Hi all I am 26 year old female and really struggling with depression. I am unmedicated. I live with my parents.

My whole life I have felt down, isolated and depressed. I was a good student, got good grades but was never popular, I got bullied.Things improved after school. Relationship wise, I have been in bad relationships, abusive ones. I blamed myself for these and they blamed me too. I also have friends that I get close to that let me down horribly and I am forced to cut them off.

I really feel misery is my destiny. I fight every day to be positive, I listen to positive affirmations. But I have a punch in the gut Depression everyday. I struggle to get through every waking minute. Everyone my age seems to be thriving and I am dying. I have a chronic health condition, which means I am in chronic pain, every day.

What can I do when everything has gone wrong for me? All I want to do is meet someone, settle down and have a stable job, but my life is hell.