Re: Get help

Just to let you know... I'm a female. A lesbian woman. I'm the dominant person in the relationship so I'm expected to do most things according to how men do them. But my mom raised me to believe that when someone tries to hurt you don't allow it, stand up for yourself. Initially it felt like that's what I was doing...A few hours later I honestly think I was just having too much fun. Sick sounding? How could I say I love this person and do this to them? I think I expressed all the pain she ever put on me by putting my hands on her. She's a hard pill to swollow, but a pill I chose to deal with. She's home with me again and its been extremely hard. I know I need help but its hard to focus on finding help and taking it serious when she's constantly making me feel like shit. Nothing I do is right and if I even think about standing up for myself she's giving me that "you need help" face. Like I must be the nuttiest female in the world. We BOTH agreed on working on us so why am I the only one working? But I made a vow that I would change but I can't even speak up on shit every little thing is..."Focus on what you need to do, you're the one that has problems"