I did'nt know. Lately, I've had a feeling that you have been going through something heavy. You have already been in my thoughts and prayers. God has always shown Himself strongest in my life when I have been at the bottom. As for my life, He lead me to bitter waters and used those experiences to help me grow stronger in Him. I would not trade those horrible times for anything. I learned so much. I would not be what I am today with out those times. Not that I am all that as I am not, but you should have seen the mess I once was. I am not saying that this is your situation as I have no idea. I'm, just sharing my thoughts. I've heard that our tears are so precious to Him that He is saving every one of them in a bottle. :)