It is interesting to note that these people I observe being very nasty to him/her are of the similar ilk - cut from the same typical, competitive, shadenfreude-ish folks in the world who can't stand to see something good in or for another. I am not alone in my observation, and I have witnessed this for enough decades to question - I disagree with the general consensus as do some others. Some of us find him/her to be as great as I described, and we don't understand what the rancor is, but then we are not from the extended family where he/she has been put down, picked on, judged and ridiculed - nor have we been married to him/her. We are friends and find it easy to be.
I disagree that he/she must do/think something different and then they will cease being ugly. For me this reeks of blame the victim, much like what our society still does around rape. From my own experience I have felt the sting of the slap of being brutalized by another and further insulted by being told it was my fault.