Re: Feel like a disappointment...

There's a bigger picture you're not seeing here because you're within the forest.
I can see you for the trees.

Your grandmother's exit was coming. You convinced her because you felt she needed to go see her brother. In retrospect, had you a key-in to the ether, you might well know that had she not done that - she'd have regretted it or they'd have not seen each other before one of them departed. Perhaps her quick infection and exit was the more enlightened version (meaning suffer from a huge life-altering trip or suffer longer from boredom and being sedentary) she could have experienced.

More over - when you transmit - you see as the Christian bible says 'through a glass clearly'. Once on the other side, we're filled with compassion and a much greater understanding of 'why things were the way they were'. Your grandmother is filled with elation for everything she experienced while having a body - all the pain and joy that is ours to experience while we're here. No quick infection and exit will taint her joy in having seen Switzerland and her brother.

Do remember also (a lesson I must personally remind myself OFTEN (been here done that)) - that each day you subtly or not-so-subtly punish yourself in your loved one's name does them absolutely no good. And they feel a lack of joy for you not celebrating your life and how wonderful you are. When we're here we don't really get a grasp, unfortunately, for what we were ever capable of. But - as God knows, so do those that knew us in physical form and if you believe in Guardian Angels, they know too - just how beautiful and perfect we really are. Trust me when I say - your grandmother wants NOTHING more for you to express your love for her than for you to celebrate your own life.

Peace & Love,

Miss H


'Most of the shadows of this life are caused by our standing in our own sunshine.'

-Ralph Waldo Emerson Tweet