I am so sorry you are going through what you're going through. My heart goes out to you truly. Think about your children and always put them first. They need you more than anything in this world. Don't waste your time drinking yourself away. I would seek a good conselour to deal with this in a healthy way beside using drinking as a crutch. You sound like a really wonderful man and father. So when you feel sadden by this think about the most precious and greatest ones that came from that marriage. Your beautiful children. And create a "happy" "peaceful" life and space at your apartment for them. But always remind them you both will always be there for them. For your ex wife, never show your anger or talk bad about her in front of the children. They can sense tension and this would cause saddiness in there little hearts and discourage them from dealing with this. Divorce is a hard and heartbreaking thing to deal with. Especially for the children. I would still seek a good conselour to deal with this. Always be strong and be happy, Put your focus on your children and take better care of yourself. Because your children need you.