'Desert' is used as a metaphor rather than in the literal sense.
Seems that living in the desert is not for you.
And by what you are saying it seems like you would like to paddle my behind just to set me right, because I'm not lining up with your borrowed 'holier than thou' Christian ideological crap. This sounds familiar... http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p1tiQB8gt5g