Re: *Update*

The only way one can have self-esteem is to build a life you're proud of, not depend on relationships for your happiness. You are giving a lot of mixed messages about whether or not you really want a relationship; one minute you want a way to "capture" his heart...the next you push him away.

You probably don't want to believe this, but it is a sign you're not ready for a relationship yet. Sure, we all want "love", but you're not ready to reciprocate, by your own words. Too many women are in love with love, sacrificing everything for a fleeting feeling.

Build self-esteem by doing something that makes you proud of who you are, not dependant on a man's approval or love. Then you'll feel worthy of love. When you are busy living your own life, that's when the right one comes knocking...and perhaps you'll like yourself enough by then to accept him.