I absolutely agree that fasting is the worst thing right now in your situation and it can easily put you on the path back to anorexia. I also know that by gaining too much, that also makes you more desperate and pushes you back to anorexia. Check out the Raw Vegetarian forum. That is supposed to be good for getting the ideal body but it is very healthy and you eat without counting/restricting calories. I hang out there nowadays so maybe I'll see you over there.