Ynaig, you asked me for my opinion based on the information you gave me, and I gave it. You did not give me the full picture. You keep adding to it. I'm not a mind reader. If you had told me all that information up front, I would have given you a very different answer.
It's now up to you to deal with your hurt, as you are the only one that is responsible for how you feel. And if you expect an answer that conforms to your beliefs and you don't get it, then you will be hurt.
So, what you deem as judgement from me, is really a judgement from you. It's always a turnaround.
Never mind, I'm not inclined to say any more about it. I'm not interested in why something happened, I'm only interested in working with the present.