O/T: sisters are fun /T: sisters are fun <--- slight sarcasm and bemusement

(off topic for oil pullers, but ya'all are who I talk to most online, so I thought I'd share a little pre-holiday family "togetherness" -cheesy grin-)
I had a really great yoga session today, the first one I've been to in over a week so I was well due for some breathing exercises and letting go of negative energy. The universe has a funny way of testing, and I think I'm doing pretty good after a negative exchange with my sister where I tried to stay as calm as possible while maintaining that my position was not wrong (not that I was saying that mine was "RIGHT!" only that I had no guilt or negative emotion at a current situation.

synopsis:
I've had a close relationship with Sister A most of my life as she didn't fit the alpha pattern my other two sisters followed. The past few years, I've not been as close with her, going in and out of talking to her, and also becoming increasingly disappointed in who she is as a person. Just before Easter, a situation occurred over a month-long period where my father really needed help. All the sisters pitched in except for Sister A (and initially, I was okay with this because I knew that she'd been hurt by a decision my parents had made-- mainly not to let her rent the family house anymore while my parents were overseas. However, I told her that she needed to move out before my father came home to clean out all the family stuff from the house before renting to a more reliable renter--and one who could pay more. She did not leave, did not help clean or move out stuff, and when it came to the last day, her stuff was still in the way, and then she called frantic to my other two sisters asking if they were going to help HER move. ooo--kay.)

That was just previous to Easter. Now, since then, the sisters and parents (minus sister A) have shared everything that went on, so initially I wasn't as angry because I didn't know everything that had gone on. The last straw was when Easter rolls around and I'm talking to Sister A on the phone; she was about to head over to Sister B's house for Easter dinner and she says, "I think Sister B is mad at me. Do you know anything?"

The complete ignorance was what got me. To be so selfish was one thing-- she could stand on principle, and whatever-- we all have our stubborn streaks. But to be completely ignorant of that???

Since then, I've not talked to Sister A, and have filtered through various emotions. Lately I've been having dreams with Sister A in them where I feel very negatively towards her. I feel that the past couple of days, I've finally let that go (or so I hope.) Don't get me wrong, I still feel she was wrong to do what she did, and her ignorance is disgusting. But that's who she is. It's only the past couple of years that a bunch of stuff has added up to me personally about who my sister is.


Now-- I'm an extremely judgmental person. I'm also very honest about that. If something happens in a friendship, I will drop it immediately if I feel that the person is not honorable, or loyal. (Boyfriends are another matter, but hey, we've all got our weak spots and that's why I'm not dating for a while.)

Now, Sister B decided to get into the act yesterday when I sent Sister B and my mother an invite to a function that I thought they'd both enjoy over the holidays. Neither Sister A, nor Sister C were invited-- Sister A because I'm going to limit my time with her as much as possible and Sister C because I didn't think this was quite her type of thing.

Now Sister B is on my ass, increasingly aggressive, about how rude I am to not invite Sister A to the function (which, btw, is not a big deal. It's a small day fair for jewelers.) I've been as mellow as I can, and have forwarded the emails to my parents to keep Sister B from stirring them up and acting as if I'm a hellsponte of negativity.


because, really, this is lame. And that's why, even though all my good energy from yoga hasn't completely dissipated, I'm going to go to Barnes and Noble to read for an hour. No point letting this issue get exacerbated in my head.

However, I do find it humorous that not only have a)Sister B, who initially was even more militant against Sister A (and I was the one slightly protecting Sister A before Easter) is freaking out in a matter of two emails! and b) holidays are so stressful-- I guess this is the opening bell to WELCOME ME TO THE HOLIDAYS!!!


Hope the rest of you are likewise able to deal with negative situations with objectivity and grace (not saying that I've got a complete handle on it, but for a change I think I'm not far off the point.) Tweet