Hey everyone,

I just wanted to introduce myself to the forum after having coming here for a while and reading a lot of your posts/threads. I decided that enough was enough, and that I better join--lest I start to feel like a stalker. :-)

Just as an intro to my intro, I am not new to fasting, but I am new to fasting for the reason that I am. I wanted to share my story/views with you, because after reading posts from the fasting for weight loss forums, the juice fasting forums, and this forum, I came across a few people's posts/stories that made me want to share my own. As a disclaimer, I hope I don't offend anyone here with my views--although I don't really think I'm all that offensive in nature. :-)

Currently I am on day 6 of a 40 day water fast, and for anyone who's interested in reading about this, I'm chronicling my journey here, at:

http://livingonliquidalone.blogspot.com


I don't want this post to be ridiculously longer than probably will be, but there is another, more personal 'introduction' on my blog. It's the first post. :-)

Anyway here's my "story"...which I'm not really sure is an actual story, but onward:

As I mentioned earlier, I am on day 6 of my 40 day water fast. The time is flying by. I have many reasons to undertake this extended fast. Mainly though, I am in definite need of a spiritual and physical detox, and I am ready to take my life journey to a whole new level. I am aware of the lengthiness of this entire process, but Rome was not built in a day. :-) And just to beat someone to the punch, I am aware of how long this fast is, and quite at peace with it. However, I will always listen to my body and will gradually re-feed before the 40 days is over, if I feel it's necessary. I will do so on diluted fresh juices, and then slowly build up to raw fruits and vegetables. Until then though, I don't have any intention of making this a shorter fast. Mentally I have just been feeling over the moon which has had the ability to lessen the physical blows my body has been taking while detoxing.

I am quite a bit overweight, but I have to tell you that losing weight, for the first time ever, is absolutely not my goal, and I refuse to make my ultimate goal, or a goal in general. I don't view myself as someone who is simply overweight, but I view myself as someone is who in clear, dire need of a major detox. I have been quite sick for the last several months, and now I know that is directly because of what I've been putting into my body. I will say though, I did weigh myself on Day 1 and plan to weigh myself again on the morning of day 41. This is not only to satiate my curiosity, but I'd like to compare the stats with that of my subsequent juice fast that I will be gradually moving into, over a period about 1-2 weeks. Part of why I am chronicling my journey, is to be able compare various things such as feelings, emotions, detox symptoms, cognitive function, and energy levels on both types of fasts. I think these will be important details that I can take into account and learn from for future fasts. I'm also curious to know, just because I'm also a suc*** for wanting to know all the details of my story. I know people will ask, and I would like to have an answer, even though the weight loss is only a by-product of the lifestyle changes I'm in the process of making. Other than for these reasons however, I refuse to weigh myself or talk about goal weights, or any of that. I'm mean for Pete's sake, having been substantially overweight for most of my life, I wouldn't even know what my ideal weight would even be or look like. It's hard for me to get attached to a specific number on the scale. And besides, I'm Water Fasting for an extended period of time! Then I am transitioning into a juice fast, and from that to a mostly raw, plant based diet with only a moderate amount of meats. My body' will be ridding itself of all the junk I've accumulated. Of course the scale is going to go down. There's no point in weighing myself daily. I am free from that! To go by how I feel (and my improvements) would be much more beneficial.

A lot of people are wondering where this change came from, and all I can say is: call it "God", call it "Allah", call it whatever you want. To me, it's a gift from the Universe. My attitude toward fasting, food, and eating has completely changed. I have come to a lot of realizations within this short period of time. I had a huge epiphany that "weight loss" and the desire to lose weight was the worst mistake I could ever have made. In my life, the goal of weight loss was one made in desperation. This desperation was caused by social pressures mainly, and a skewed view that being "thin" would solve most of my problems. The last thing on one's mind should be weight loss when s/he realizes that they are unhealthy (and perhaps overweight), but it's often the first. In a society where thinness and discrimination prevail, it's hard not to look outside of yourself for the answer. Unfortunately, a lot of people truly don't realize that the "answer" is not in your looks. The whole "change your lifestyle" thing is said all the time, but who actually takes it to heart and listens? I know that I certainly didn't, but I finally know it to be true! This, alone, has been very detoxifying! I now feel that people who believe they need to lose weight to be healthy have it backwards. You need to truly aspire to be healthy/healthier first. It begins as a mental and spiritual process first. "Mind over matter", as they say. :-) Personally, I find that by making health my primary goal, I can start the process where it really ought to be started. Again, weight loss is only a by-product of all of this. With that being said however, I would be lying to you if I said that I wasn't excited by seeing major physical changes in my body. I am curious to know what that will look like, but I can say, with great delight, that I have not thought about or set aside any "skinny" clothes or any other similar rituals that I've previously performed. At this point, I'm really not interested in knowing what my body will look like in a 1 or 2 piece bathing suit either. I'll get there when I get there, and won't busy myself with these sorts of thoughts/goals, because for once in my life, weight loss is not my motivator. I am free!

Just to let you know, before, I would read a lot about fasting, just to make sure it was humanly possible. Its cleansing/detoxing benefits were of no interest to me, except to let me know that it was healthy enough to try. I knew re-feeding was very important, but never placed too much, if any, emphasis on it. As long as I lost weight, that's all that mattered. Now, that has completely changed. I devour articles that explain what exactly the body goes through during a fast. It brings me utter delight to know that I'm doing right not only by my body, but by my mind as well. On this fast, I encourage myself to heal everyday and to tackle various psychological issues, especially in regards to my relationship with food. I am learning new coping strategies, and trying to implement them into my life. The changes, (some huge, some small, some quick, some gradual) have been amazing! I haven't had cravings so much as split-second visions/memories of foods that are bad for me. Because of my awareness of the psychological and physiological effects of food/eating, I am now able to rationalize those "cravings", and they disappear almost instantaneously.

Other things that have worked for me, and I feel have been very beneficial to my fast:

-finally listening to my dentist and flossing mostly everyday to promote healthy gums and a cleaner mouth. With such sensitive gums, I hated to floss because it hurt a lot, but after a few weeks that went away.

-keeping a blog/online journal (which is very motivating, and helps me to keep track of this experience)

-having a supportive spouse and friends who know that I'm fasting for all the right reasons and encourage me all the way

-reading articles about the fasting process and how it works to aid the body

-reading posts, threads, online journals/blogs, and stories from other fasters. (Analysing and understanding their choices often help me to analyse my own)

-thoroughly enjoying my sense of smell and the smell of foods instead of shying away from it for fear of temptation. (This has been extremely beneficial for me in reprogramming my relationship with food. I now enjoy and embrace the smell of food on my fast. You don't need eat to enjoy it)

-not hiding or avoiding the food in my environment, because I believe that I have to come face to face with the psychological effects that eating has on me. (For me to fast but then try to avoid foods at all costs, only enforces that I am a slave to my food addictions. I must take the power away from emotional eating and the addiction to food by allowing myself to come into contact with all foods. I think that fasting is an especially good time to do this, and this practice has actually worked wonders for me, thus far)

-visualizing my body's healing process, which results in a much more healthier, vibrant me

-getting excited about the detox process even though a lot of the time it downright hurts! (Rejoice in the signs of detox!)

-getting some fresh air and taking a walk everyday

-planning/thinking of physical activities that I will do for my health (post water-fast) , such as hiking, canoeing, riding my bicycle to commute, camping, taking up a sport, etc. (I realized that all my special outings/times with friends/family (especially my partner) has revolved around food! Yikes! I embrace forming new, better habits. I know that eating is also a very social thing, but every minute of the day? I was way too excessive)

Lastly, the most important thing that has helped me is realizing that although I am only beginning my spiritual journey of transformation, I am already the "new" me. I am a changed person now, and I continue to evolve. The new me cannot emerge after my fast, but it had to emerge before my fast. I had to change my mind first before I could go ahead and change my body.

I am SO sorry that this post has been so long. I'm sure you can tell that I spend a great deal of time analysing my behaviours and philosophizing, but I truly believe that invigorating my mind is what will make this fast a complete success. I hope to learn even more from this community in the coming weeks, and am really happy that these forums exist.

Take care everyone,

estugrrl