Grrrr

Messed up me....

Date:   10/15/2005 1:21:56 PM   ( 19 y ) ... viewed 2628 times

Here I am on a spiritual retreat and I dont feel good. Last night I binged on dessert and felt so guilty that I purged as much as I could take. Now today I cant stop thinking about a freaking Dairy Queen Blizzard. And to make matters worse, I left my wallet at home and have considered driving there to get it just so I can get a Blizzard. If I try to borrow some money from somone then they might find out what I am planning on doing. I'm such a freakin addict! I didn;t feel like going to the AA meeting cause I didn't want to hear about everyones retreat. Something is wrong with me and I dont want to face it, I just want to control it. I keep testing my ability to surrender by fighting with the idea of driving home to get my wallet....what a messed up thing! Maybe I should just take a nap to get closer to dinner time....I should talk to someone, now!

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• Sometimes it just plain sucks to be frustrated and human! This too shall.   by 9thbody     19 y