Resuming the resuming process.

never never never give up

Date:   2/27/2013 5:28:47 PM   ( 11 y ) ... viewed 1419 times

I read my last blog from 7 months ago. I am so happy to say that I am still running. My weight has not changed and I believe that is due to muscle mass. My glutes are very, very happy and that seems to make a couple of others happy each day. It feels good to be almost 49 and 'hotter than 40 acres of burning stumps' as a retired Vietnam vet fighter pilot has told me on more than one occasion. I've been praying for God to please make me a woman worthy of the man I would like to be with and for a man who actually sees me for who I am - not just a pair of glutes. He has brought that vet and a surgeon to me and they both truly do see me, cherish me, value me, and encourage me. They are both very married and have very good, safe physical and emotional boundaries. It is a relief to not be chased by married men but friends with them. It's a healthy first step to growing into the mature, capable woman that I truly am and have been in the past. I am better than ever and that is the truth. I completed 3 semester of half-time school and have been passing beautifully. I took this semester off to be able to work overtime so that I may better pay my bills.

Work relationships have improved, I have improved. When I stopped reacting it enabled the bosses to identify core issues and they had nothing to do with me. I was the reactor. Funny how I really impeded progress for them and couldn't see it. Glad I got through that.

Still baking for my friends and loving it. Paula Deen has a pineapple upside down cake recipe I made that has 2 layers and has frosted sides with pineapple butter cream frosting. It was amazing. I walked over and brought "Cowboy" a piece and he so enjoyed it. It's nice to please him. He'll have to decide for himself if he wants to say hello more often. That's all it is - a 'hello' here and there. Oh well. A lady does not go where she is not invited. To be sure.

So now what? Uh. The usual. Raw vegan challenge. hahahahaha! It's been what, 7 years? About that. The farthest I've gotten has been what 6 weeks? 10 weeks? Then BAM! back to beef, cheese, sour cream, ice cream - anything cow it seems. *sigh* That's okay. Never give up for what is right. It really is right to make that the base of my life with balance. It takes a good cleaning out to begin, I believe. That's why I am picking back up the tool of blogging. It's not like fb - it's more for me and for my eyes. I like the anonymity and the seemingly low traffic. I have a voice saying, "Yeah, no accountability." Ouch. I hate when that happens. Truth brain burps. *sigh*

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