Feeling a little Frustrated

eating disorders

Date:   3/7/2010 2:33:30 PM   ( 14 y ) ... viewed 45842 times

Currently, I am feeling frustrated with myself. I had a pretty good week, but yesterday when I woke up at home alone, I decided it was time to eat some cookies, candies, and a piece of pie. I then felt really icky after and I think I gained a couple of pounds. It goes to show that I still struggle to this day with my overeating. I go from 112-116, the latter is after a binge. 112 is my good weight. I am 5'1.5''. I know I am not fat, but I had such a strange dream last night.

This tall thin guy that looked like Leonardo Dicaprio was in my dream. He walked up to me and said that he is 6' tall and he weighs 130lbs. I said well I am 5'2'' and weigh 125lbs! (I don't know why I said that). So, he starts telling me that "everything is just so much easier being thin. It's easier to eat less, only eat when you are really hungry." Okay I thought, I have done it before and I can do it again.

What a weird weird dream. :( I wonder what it meant. I think I am terified of gaining weight again. I want to be thin too.

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