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Winter Scary Dream
intro to Macrobiotics, a scare winter dream...
Date: 11/15/2005 8:31:22 AM ( 19 y ) ... viewed 1033 times Yesterday was a writeoff.
Wasn't able to do too much but rest.
Glad I did as much as i did---got the
rent monies into the bank. Counted up
the final tally of funds from the Pacific Sym
and got that in the bank too.
Woke up this morning in the middle of a scary
winter dream.
I was with Mark Victor Hansen somewhere on
the UCSD Campus and we were excited about something
and on a roll...the EG Mobile was having battery problems again
and so someone took out --separated--the battery from the
body and put it on some kind of cart and and then it worked
and we were off in some cavern riding along these narrow
straits when that also stopped working. We were so on the run
that we just left it, and I thought I will get back later and take care of it,
but later, I was Mark went off on his own and I went off on my own.
I felt this sadness that i never got out of school. A deep sadness
and a recurring dream: Staying in school year after year after
my school mates have left the campus, sneaking around attending
classes year after year.
in another part of the dream, I saw about give lovely women
from the Whole Being Weekend who were running on the campus
in deep joy. They were all wearing nurse outfits and worked at the
Medical Center. They were running with my housemate Scott
who also loves a good party.
They all ran into this hall where there was a party.
I got to the door after them and paid something to get in.
There were a lot of people in there, but once I got in
the Whole Beingers and Scott where no where to be found.
They had run out another door, to another party that was more fun.
I was left in there. When I asked what this gathering was.
Someone said, they were communists. My heart dropped.
I was not wanting something political. I liked the hall. IT had
trees growing through it. FInally I left, but was lost. THen
I realized I did not have a clue where my vehicle was--
where were the parts of the EG Mobile.
So what does not have to to do with my life? I ask myself.
Parts of the dream have to do with
with not fully making a living
using turning my gifts into a flow of giving and receiving money.
The main thing for me as far as work is not selling my soul.
I would die literally--or so it feels--if I did many of the things
that others do to make ends meet in this broken world.
I know I am here for some other purpose. I know it takes
infinite courage to do that other purpose. I have to go through
all my dark areas and turn them into something that mends
that crack in my own wholeness and in doing so, mends the
crack in this world.
but that does not heal the pain...the split that is so pervasive
in me and in the world...knowing is not enough...we still have to
act on what we know if we want the wisdom and the flow that
would be natural to us.
Bingo! We are living in a very unnatural way in a very natural world.
There are some of us who have excaped. We are on the sidelines maybe
watching the show. We got on the sidelines through great cost.
We became ill. We realized we could not function in the world. IT was
killing us. So here we are being asked by spirit to Plant Your Dream.
Plant Your Dream: This is no easy task. The inner and outer worlds
are so disconnected that way we have it set up.
The Health Classic that i did this past weekend. The environment
was so toxic. I was very uncomfortable. There was not a healthy enough
buffer between the sick environment building and the sick people.
There were not enough well people connected enough in Qi to balance
the sickness. I was so tired throughout the event. I am sure others
where drawing on my energy.
There was this little dog...a chiwawa. He kept barking at me.
Every time I came into the room, he would bark. One man who
was a helper asked me...what is this thing you have with dogs?
Generally, dogs love me if they are loveable. I am not sure what
that dog was sensing. He was not barking hardly at others. IF someone
picked him up and was totally loving him, he was quiet. He would even
let me come up and he would lick my hand, but then, later, he would be
barking again on his leash. I do not have the full sense of that energetically.
Maybe he saw something unfamilar around me that threatened him.
He was not use to feeling my kind of person. I sense that dogs
see the whole of things...your energies invisible including spirit helpers.
I was not a spirit keeper at this event. I set up one little table with some
of my love cures. This was one of the few places in my entire life
where there were more people who felt uncomfortable with reading
these words than those who liked them.
One wild man--the golf teacher--bought a set. He was repeating the
words to a delightful young woman from Tijuana. I learned later she
was in grief. Her mother had died this year not many months previous.
She had taken over a stationary store. She was very young and beautiful,
very innocent, and she spoke of her dreams that she had once done
gymastics, and she wanted to work with kids. I got the sense that now
she was burdened running this stationary store in the middle of downtown
toxic Tijuana. Near the end, when we did some thank you's to the staff,
and I had read aloud one sweet little poem--that crates community--
I watched her off to the side shedding tears. I imagine she was feeling
a pain that she knew she would be soon returning to her prison.
This weekend was a break for her, and now she had to return.
I asked if she would like to see my photos. They were on the table
in a thick notebook. She could feel the Chi. She asked if I had any
with deer. She liked deer. I asked if she had an email. I thought maybe
to stay in touch. She said she communicated by phone. I did not even
ask for her #. I gave her my card, but do not imagine I will ever see her
again. She will be lost in the downtown of her life.
She was deeply wanting, so was deeply drawn to the Macrobiotic principles
behind this way of living. She was looking deeply for a way of living.
That was what drew her here on a quest. I could see she was on a quest.
Most of us are the same as far as eating goes.
We are lost. There are no principles behind why we are eating.
How we are eating is about ten miles distance from principles.
We are--many of us--caught up in some fragmented system, some
broken consciousness that is further fed by what we stick in our mouths
that basically has no pattern of wholeness behind it.
There is an energetic wholeness that runs through the universe,
that connects the most inner to the most outer. In the Kabbalah
they speak of this wholeness in terms of divine sparks that have been
broken off a chard and exploded into this world. Someone, the sparks
return to wholeness as each gains in wisdom, and reconnects.
That is what Plant Your Dream is all about. It is about the reconnection,
the bringing together all the worlds through planting our soil here in this
desolated, decimated place that can be heaven on earth.
In the Macrobiotic model based on Oriental philosophy, There is a
substance called Qi, a life force that flows. You can strengthen the
flow when you practice the principles through your way of living...
Meditation, breathing, moving...Chi Gong...are some of the keys
that keep the Qi flowing.
Eating is one of the most basic keys to keeping it all together.
Macrobiotic eating is all about finding the balance,
the balance between the Yin and Yang of things,
with a awareness of the five transformations that occur through
the seasons.
The five transformations are
water-winter- kldneys
wood-spring-liver
fire-summer--heart (?)
late summer--earth
fall--metal--
(missing parts...I will check my notes...)
In Macrobiotics you eat with the seasons. You eat naturally
in harmony with the universe. This is where the alchemy takes place.
"Eating with the Seasons" is one simple book by a doctor I know,
Elson Haas, M.D. who explains some of this.
The teacher at the conference who has a lot to say on all this
is Karre Bursell. He has many articles online on his
http://www.Alchemycalpages.com
More later on this topic.
going to bed again soon
after I write on gut issues.
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Eating with the Seasons
Staying healthy by keeping in touch with nature's cycles
—By Karen Olson, Utne magazine
September / October 2003 Issue
Fresh spring lettuce, succulent fruits in summer, autumn's squash and wild rice, root vegetables in winter. Eating fresh seasonal produce not only is delicious, it is a good way to connect with the rhythms of the natural world. And that, according to Dr. Elson Haas, founder and director of the Preventive Medical Center in San Rafael, California, is essential to good health.
--Utne Reader on line
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