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Coming to terms with my possessions Feb 19 2011
Coming to terms with my possessions
Feb 19 2011.
Can I make some progress?
Can I toss out some things without
processing them?
Date: 2/19/2011 11:16:05 AM ( 13 y ) ... viewed 1351 times
9:06 am
February 19, 2011
This feels serious.
I have created and created
and left notebooks and other materials behind
that have to be dealt with.
It seems it would take thousands of hours
to go through the materials I have to cull out
what it taking up too much space on my shelfs.
It is definitely a problem.
I am deeply depressed about not being able
to come to terms with the things I have.
In the last week,
I have had days where I feel I am in a coffin.
I am surrounded by things that still have energy
but they are taking up space.
When I touched one notebook yesterday in the basement,
another storage area of mine, I was able to clear the notebook
and recycle most of what was in there.
I ended up bring into my space one sample each.
It would take me an hour likely to retype this material.
I could scan it.
I am at a loss of inspiration now,
and working with these materials does not help me.
It is winter, and my season begins with the
Natural Product Expo West.
It saddens me that my time now is so taken up with
the house and our need for new housemates.
I will attempt to recycle some things today.
9:23 am
I have this sad feeling that while I am
spending time in feelings of depression
and hitting a wall in my life,
there are others who are immersed in life.
They are planning conferences and doing joyful
activity.
I have created this condition as a result of
past living that has not fully been processed
and completed. Too many artifacts left behind,
things that still have meaning
but are taking up room.
No more room here.
I have had a wonderful life and done many
wonderful things.
I need to adjust to letting go of so many
things if I want to get into another part of life
that is more enjoyable.
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