You need to realize that you are worthy of being loved. You are worthy of being considered first. You are also worthy of being first in your own eyes. Let your boyfriend know that you have trouble accepting love from him. If it frightens you, admit it. There is nothing to be guilty about when someone loves you, you don't need to be last! Take a deep breathe and plunge into a conversation with him that lets him in on your insecurities. Then start telling yourself that you deserve love. Say outloud, I am worthy of love!