tmj pain and surgery

I'm hoping that theres someone out there that can empathise and add any hope or suggestions.
I've had tmj pain for 7yrs!!!!
it has taken so long to be believed, that my family all but mother, just think its a headache or something, and ignore me.
I had my joints washed out yesterday for the second time. First time I had to wait 2mths for a splint, by which time I was in worse pain. When I eventually got the splint< it irritated my mouth, so I had to file it down, and I can't eat or talk properly which is a pain considering my job as a Teaching assistant to SEN kids.
Like I say, I had it done again yesterday, and am worried, as last time felt great after surgery and this time feel sickly, neck ache, can hardly open my mouth.
Is this ever gonna work, I can't bear my own moaning, let alone the lack of support from my otherhalf and people at work thinking I'm trying it on.
Please anybody that can help or knows what this is like I could do with a shoulder (and a new jaw!!)
Also had anyone had to have more invasive intervention or surgery, when do you reach that stage and what does it involve. Negative thinking I know, but I'm worried that this is the end of the road!!!!!!