I am so sorry that you are the victim of such a heinous, criminal act. Did you report the incident? Are you involved in counseling?
I earnestly hope that you reported the incident - what you were forced to endure was a violent crime, not a sexual escapade. I would gently urge you to seek professional counseling/therapy from someone who specializes in victims of violent crimes and report the incident (no matter HOW long ago it happened). Rape is not an act of sexual gratification - it is a crime of violence, control, degradation, humiliation, and it happens to men more often than is imaginable.
God bless you in your journey from victim to Survivor.