Belief & Knowing

Two things I would like you to explain me more in details. You mention two Gods, one the God you met while you was in your near death experience and the other God, you refer to as the "God of this world". Can you explain me what do you exactly mean by that? Do you believe there are two Gods in existence or you think is the same God but acting differently here and overthere?


Before my NDE, I believed in a two faced God. In one moment a loving God and in the next moment, a "Vengeance is Mine Saith The Lord!" God and that vengeance was horrifying burning flesh in hell. When I met God in heaven and learned how God viewed not just me but everyone with a soul I knew different. We are God's precious children. God wants everything for us but we who chose by following the god of this world, fell, and we burn in our flesh until we return to Heaven. This god who I fell with is the lesser god who rules this world. Sometimes, he is my father when I pray for my physical desires[

"You are of your father the devil, and you want to do the desires of your father. He was a murderer from the beginning, and does not stand in the truth, because there is no truth in him. Whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature; for he is a liar, and the father of lies." (John 8:44).

While the librarian I met between heaven and earth did not call himself God or the Devil, I believe he(the Librarian) is running the ship that is earth. He, unlike the orbs of light I saw in heaven who had no clothes, had a long flowing white beard and a long white flowing white robe and he looked like the God I would have expected to see in heaven but he is not God... at least he is not the God I want to answer my prayers when I call that name when I am in trouble or my heart is broken. The Librarian I met has a self appointed job and he is trying to run the whole world AND everything in it all at once and he is very stressed out. He reminds me of a workaholic who lashes out at everyone around him if they don't get everything right or when don't do things the way they way they agreed to do them before they fell. The Librarian is messing around with charts and symbols all of the time, creating mathmatical 3D models, and trying to line up the material world into a system of rewards and punishments for every little action we do and match our actions with every other action we do while we are on earth... all the while recording every souls actions. He is mighty busy but is he God? This Librarian showed me how things will go in the world. He showed me my part to play and my part in the larger picture. The Librarian to me could very well be that devil Jesus was speaking about...but he didn't seem so bad when I met him... He wanted me to respect him and he wanted to teach me how the world worked. It was totally fascinating. When he showed me the whole history of the world, from its creation to its final end in a fiery explosion, it stunned me. But the Librarian is only important in the physical world and the heavens...not in Heaven. The Librarian showed me how each molecule affected each other molecule but more than that, the Lirarian showed me that my intentions could change the world...and not just my intentions but that every other being on earth has that same capacity...to change the world with their intentions...

Whoever the Librarian is, I know he is not the God I met in the Throne Room Judgement Hall who is made of pure light and love and he was not my guide(or pre-Jesus) that stood beside me as I went before the Judgement but whoever the Librarian is, he believes he is in charge of things. And maybe he is. I think the Librarian may very well be the father of religion. He is very concerned about religious things. The God I met in heaven was concerned about how much I had learned about love... I don't have to flip a coin to know who to pray to. If I want a big house, riches and wealth, things that I can not take with me to the other side, the Librarian would be the one to ask...but if I want to prepare a place in heaven built on the conerstone of love, I have to go to the source of that love...

Saying there are two Gods is not something I believe in exactly... I believe what I always thought about God before my NDE was that God was a God who loved me but if I got out of line, there he was ...ready punish me. It was a love/hate relationship. Saying "I believed" is not the same as "I know." I always asked God to forgive me for my sins before my NDE and I still do that from time to time but what I know post-NDE and what I believed before my NDE just didn't make sense. My post-NDE God, "I know" doesn't even see my sin. It is not even important for the God I met in heaven to knock me around for messing up. I don't believe it...I know it...

I figured out that when I get out of line with what God wants for me(everything wonderful and awesome just like I would want for my own child), I end up hurting myself. God doesn't want me to get hurt but I have to learn the hard way...that is why I fell... God does judge me for those times I get out of line but God's judgement is different from what I thought as a child. When I express loving intentions, God looks on me but when I do not express loving intentions, God does not see me. When God looks on me, my intentions are full of love(God) when my intentions are not loving intetions, I am invisible to God. This is the secret that I learned in heaven... God's vengeance is our separation from divine love... As soon as we turn our intentions to the light of God's love...the same thing I knew as a young child until what I knew turned into beliefs. I believed God loved me... my whole life but post NDE, I knew like I knew God loved me as a very young child..


The second question I have is: Would you consider your near death experience as just the "portal" of what we will see when we all die or do you think what you saw and experienced is "the whole thing" of how heaven really is?

Part of me was connected to my body below but I was more fully in heaven than I was in my body. My body is just a vessel for my soul. As far as what I experienced being "the whole thing" that is heaven... no...Heaven is big enough to encompass...