???

I've been debating whether or not I should post these dreams. I had them Saturday night/Sunday morning. One of them really bothers me, and I cant seem to figure out its meaning. Total I had 5 dreams, and still remember them all vividly. The first dream was more of a nightmare. I woke up as soon as it was finished and my heart was pounding. Here is the first one.

I'm talking with Tracey online. I ask her something, and I'm reading her reply. I'm sitting in front of the computer. I cant see anything but it. Everything else is pitch black. I don't even see any part of my body. It is a great insightful message. She sends me pictures of what she feels we look like. The pictures were of two beautiful women of different ethnic backgrounds hugging. Then she started to say something about how she had not seen Ami B. (Wrenn??), in a long time. There was then a picture of her and Ami. Then I start to read the part where she answers my question. "Oh my god Ashley!!!" (very excited, lots of exclamation marks) "I think I know what this might be!!" Then it goes on to something like, "sort of like multiple personalities". At that instant I feel horror run through me. And some other part of my brain takes over. My vision went blurry and all was dark. It was as if I wasn't supposed to see that. My other "personality" filters my reality. But somehow I read this, it showed itself to me. It happened in an instant, so fast. I wanted to read what she said about it. So I thought if I don't fight it, we will become one. So, I relax, but I'm still filled with horror. Then I feel a strange pressure in my head. Still all I see is darkness. My thoughts, everything, me, its starts to swirl together with this "other" me. I can feel it happening, and see it too. I'm still scared but also know this is something new, a new start to an integrated me. (??) My Fear is stopping it. I'm trying not to be afraid, but I'm screaming.

That's when I wake up. The main impression I got was that whatever I was learning was too much for me to handle. And that is why I feared it so much, because I just wasn't able to grasp the whole concept. Perhaps Reality???

The second dream I'm just not able to understand either.

I was working as a Nurses Aid on a home care case. There were two other men with me. One was an other aid. Me and him seemed to be flirting with each other. The other man was an RN, our boss. As I'm talking with the other aid I feel my nose start to run. I put my hand up to it and realize its bleeding. I excuse myself, not embarrassed, just concerned. I walk into the bathroom and stand in front of the mirror/sink. I remove my hand from my nose and the blood is VERY red. I lean my head forward toward the sink as I reach for some tissues. A lot of blood starts flowing into the sink. As this happens I hear the RN tell the aid to come in and check my blood clots. That's when I see this, bug, in the blood. Like a whitish colored moth/butterfly. I believe its dead. The oddest thing, its already in a small mini ziplock type bag. This is what I believe the boss wanted the aid to check for. I don't look at it too long because I know it will freak me out. So I look up to the mirror and start to wipe the blood away. Again, its so red. Instead of it wiping away, it sort of spreads. Its just a little hard to remove, but after a few tissues its gone.

That's all I remember of that one. I've tried to figure out what the moth/butterfly stands for, but I cant find anything. Any ideas??

I don't want to bore you with all five dreams. lol But I do want to mention a part of the 3rd. This dream is what I call the "Call Center" dream. I was working at a call center, taking health questions from people and giving them answers. And this is one of the calls I got.

A lady calls about a cactus. She gives me its number so I can look it up. 1.11.0 or 1.1.0. I look it up. Its an odd light green cactus. No prickly things. Its got thick leaves and will bear fruit. Green apple like fruit. It looks more like a hanging house plant, as its very full and hangs over the pot. There are two types of this cactus, hence the 2 different numbers. She asks me "when is the fruit ready to be picked". I tell her it depends on which version she has. One will bear fruit that looks like green apples and is the size of your fist. The other will have smaller fruit, about half the size of your fist. It appears to not help her at all. I try to ask her some more questions to figure out which plant she has but she doesn't answer. So, I hang up.

Any ideas?

Some really strange stuff has been happening. And its weird to me. Okay, like when I read Anthony and Traceys posts to me yesterday. I found it odd that Anthony mentions, getting my blood revved up. And Tracey mentions using apples juice to help with the liver flush. I read this after I had my dreams. AND, I started reading this book this morning called, Anatomy of a Spirit. I misunderstood what it was about when I checked it out. But I'm glad I did, because its about intuitive medicine. Using your senses to help heal yourself. Its an amazing book. Well, in the beginning she talks about how she came about her abilities. One thing she mentions is a time she nearly bled to death. The trauma turned the nosebleed into a massive hemorrhage. A nosebleed?? I don't know what's going on. Also, The morning I had my Sea side village dream, I was out with my Mom and Aunt driving around. And we passed a place called Chesapeake Estates, and it reminded me exactly of my dream. The connection is too much. Chesapeake Bay, Chesapeake River, a Sea side village! What is going on? Is this just Synchronicity?? Are these just clues showing me I'm on the right path?? Its just weird. I like having these things happen. I suppose its just the dreams that are freaking me out. At first I thought it was really awesome that I picked up on Traceys dolphins, and then Peachy's battery/light/energie message. Now I'm just scared. That is why I didn't want to post these dreams. Because it just seems too weird.

Thanks for listening. I know this is a bit long, but I don't know how else to express these feelings. And you guys are the only people who will understand.

Love you ALL,
Ashley