Re: Could I have autism?

I'm really disappointed no one else here was able to help you out on this, so I signed up.

I personally believe there's a very high chance you have "Asperger's Syndrome". This is what I have and was diagnosed with at 26yrs old. I could have went through all my life without ever having been diagnosed with this, and I have to say that it was more likely that I would have killed myself than have been diagnosed with this, so I got lucky.

First of all, let me tell you why this is very possible...
* It can be picked up as early as 3yrs old, but it was not recognised by the medical community until the 90's
* Even today, most doctors know nothing about AS: When I went to a doctor to be diagnosed with in Jan/Feb 2000, they REFUSED to send me to be diagnosed by a psychologist/psychiatrist - I had previously seen numerous of each and the doctor knew nothing about AS and just considered it a personality disorder (which it is not). As a note, hospitals in the UK do not treat people with personality disorders. So your only real hope is by contacting the autistic society and asking them to refer you to a specialist psychologist who diagnoses people with autistic spectrum disorders.
* I have never had friends myself, and this is because of the following reasons:
1) Poor eye contact and body posture
2) 1-sided communication (I only talk about Lego, autism, mental disorders and stuff like that - not about stupid weather or how my day is). Most "normal" people use something called "smalltalk" which involves asking others how they are, what the weather's like etc, and this is sort of a bridge to talking about other things. Those with AS typically don't use smalltalk and tend to be more direct with what they're thinking. They also tend to be rather obsessive.
3) Inability to read body language. This accounts for roughly 90% of communication, so if you are only listening to what they say, then you are at a 90% disadvantage straight away!! If I'm not mistaken, the inability to read body language is because of only being able to concentrate on 1 thing at once. If I was to concentrate on someone's body actions while talking I'm certain I'd phase out what the person was saying and end up asking them to repeat themselves.
4) Disorientation caused by being close to people/in groups. If a person with AS is too close to another person or in a group situation, the chances are that the person is going to either be "daydreaming" away (either thinking profoundly or daydreaming), or all the stuff they're listening to will fade away into a sort of muffle. It's difficult to keep track of more than 1 conversation at once.
5) Impairment of imagination. Those with AS do not think like others do and do not have "theory of mind". I was shocked to find out that most normal people try and think what other people are thinking!! I can't even attempt this, and I guess it's part of the body language thing.
6) Extended isolation. Even those who do not have AS are going to be extremely subdued in social settings if they have not had friends in 15yrs or so. Few people can really understand what it is like to be traumatised or to be shut away from society a long time, but it's definitely going to have an effect on how comfortable you are communicating with others, and others might sense how edgy you are
7) Fear. Although AS is more well known than it used to be, most people still don't know about it and are more likely to believe that someone with AS is too weird/scary to talk to, or dangerous.

It looks like I've talked waaaaaaaay too much. There are many other points to Asperger's Syndrome as well, which I can address at another time. I have just mentioned the social aspects. I consider Asperger's Syndrome to be the greatest social disability there is. Of course there is autism, but it is more "obvious" than AS is, and people tend to believe disabilities they can't see and don't understand are just made up.

I normally don't bother with forums and can't really handle them well. If you need to chat 1-1, my username is also my AOL and Yahoo Messenger name. Tweet