Character not Comfort

Hello,

I am struggling with circumstances of my life. (not the best, but I don't have to look far to know that certainly I am blessed in many, many ways)

My problem is I am waking up and walking with all day, a complete sense of doom. (I eat healthy and take the proper supplements, but have not exercised consistently in two years, so there could be a bit of depression)

I read and read. I pray and pray. I mediate deeply. In the last month or so I have had a problem praying, reading God's Word and just feeling the joy of the Lord. I have an understanding that God is not interested in our comfort before our character. I have always accepted this belief as an understanding that God wants us to look to him first before our feelings, circumstances, etc and call upon his strength. At this time, however, I am having such a hard time accepting that God's plan may include quite a bit of heartbreak and discomfort. I DO NOT want that!! There are two very stressful circumstances in my life right now (a custody battle my son is in for his infant daughter and a business partner that is probably going to put me in quite a financial jam) Neither is comfortable. Both are worrying me. And I feel so distant from the Lord. Yes, I know he is right here with me, but my selfishness is saying, "I want it this way!!" and I feel that he is walking me down a path that I am not going to like. I know, I know, he has a beautiful plan and by the way, he has blessed me in the most beautiful ways through some heart breaking times. It's just that I feel such resistance right now in dealing with my life and his plan. I have thrown fits at work and home. I have slept many hours trying to hide. I wake up feeling so doomed.

Okay, enough. Have any of you been through a part of your life where you don't want to walk God's path? You don't call on his strenght and support? I am not neccesarily talking about backsliding, I mean that YOU KNOW that the Lord has a plan and you just p[lain are not going to look at it right now. Let him do what he wants, I will deal with it when it happens. I know it sounds like Depression and maybe it is. But how do YOU call on the Lord when you are feeling like this? What Scriptures speak to you?

Thank you for your help.