HI - Your feelings for your husband problem are to personal. You and he need to be objective about his sexual encounter. This is not unusual sex. Boys and girls experiment everyday. He might think that he initiated the encounter; maybe he did, so what! Either way, he's beating himself up over a childhood incident! What he should do, is bring out any past hurts, then tell himself that it's over with. If he can't do this, then he wants to beat himself up. What you might be able to do to bring him out, is start telling him about some of your mistakes, and that you've forgiven yourself and forgotten them. This might be a way to start.