I need prayers desperately.

Dear Readers,

I am so uncomfortable and tormented by HSV2 in mouth, that I don't know what to do anymore. I need prayers for I believe God listens to prayers, day and night. Sometimes more people will be better for there will be some who can win God's mercy. Pls pray for me each and every day, as at night I can't sleep,too. Hopefully, someone on the other side of the world ( e.g. Europe and Asia )saw this and will be praying while it will be USA's night. I can't broadcast to church, as my pastor's wife said, not everyone knew of this illness will pray for me and keep it confidential, so I need help from those who knew how much I want to be healed. I don't want to die, but the pain is so much that a few times I even ask God to kill me. The reason I don't commit suicide is I felt I messed up God's workship---me, and I am too embarrassed to see Him empty handed. If now I am at my death bed, I can only said, sorry Lord, I messed up and bore no good fruit. Thanks.