Re: Being the Stepmom-one possible solution

There are some people in this world who are so toxic that you can NEVER trust them to put aside their viciousness even for the sake of such an occasion as you describe. Their mother is such a person and you are right in making plans to protect yourself and the graduation occasion from turning into a battlefield.
The only way that I have found to deal with these people is to tell them directly what you intend to do.But first you need to talk to the oldest about how she sees the ceremony and who and what she wants to happen.It is her party after all.
Children always get caught in the crossfire and they try to sooth and smooth any hostility.
I would do this --talk to the oldest( if you can)and tell her that you and her father plan to attend.Next, recruit an adult friend to agree to come along as a support person and a witness.This person should stick by you thoughout the entire commencement and also at any celebration after and he/she should make themselves prominent.This may be just enough of a discouragement for the mother to leave you alone until you leave town .... Tweet