My heart aches---and I feel so helpless...

My daughter and son-in-law have two kids who are pre-teens. Recently, she let us know that she is going to divorce son-in-law.

I won't go into details but will say this---it's not because of abuse, addiction or adultery. It's a problem that, in my opinion, they could work together to find a good solution.

My heart aches for the kids. The family moved 2 months ago, which is stressful enough when you consider transferring to a new school. And now this.

They are separated at this point. The kids are with her. She works long, crazy hours and will now have to hire babysitters. Money is already tight to begin with. I just can't shake the feeling that this will all come crashing down---and we will be the ones who will have to pick up the pieces.

Factor in that we, after a long time of wanting this to happen, finally came up with a good plan for us to move and downsize. We are now focused on doing what needs to be done.

I've cried thinking about the kids. Since they aren't our kids, there is nothing we can do. That doesn't mean I don't love them. My husband tells me it's not our problem but their parents' problem. True...but as I said, at some point if things go south, it could be our problem, too.

We've talked to her about our concerns which made her defensive and she brushed them all off. We did tell her that we love her and the kids and will be there for them.

So...I feel helpless. It's like seeing a train wreck about to happen while knowing you can't stop it.

I'm venting here, of course. That said, I'm willing to hear any thoughts or ideas as to how to cope.