Feeling Bad

Did you sometimes feel like me.. ?

I'm moody when waking up in the morning . while walking I always realize my surroundings about what they act after i pass them. I dont want to be confined in a hospital because i dont want to stink there even i take a bath.

I was born with talents in programming but how could I apply like this in an office. The lowest position I could be a Janitor in the toilet.. so sad, Opportunities always pass...