Sex after rape :(

Hey this is my first post.. Basically I was raped twice up my ex boyfriend last year. He was the first real boyfriend I had and he took my virginity with rape. Now I'm in a different relationship but we've not seen each other in a few months.. I'm now terrified about having sex again. My boyfriend and I live far away from each other so it's always a few weeks pass before we can see each other. I have started having nightmares again about my rape and I'm terrified about having sex.. My boyfriends arriving this evening. Is this normal? When will this feeling of terror leave