Mine NEVER drains on its own!

I am so envious of women who can get this to "pop." I have had to have this cut 5 times (the last was 2 months ago) and I can see I'm headed to the scalpel again tomorrow. And it is almost impossible to get anyone to answer the phone at my gynecologist. PLEASE - I don't even see any type of hole or opening. I am thinking of getting REALLY drunk and stabbing it myself. It's hurting enough that I am starting to cry now. Soon it will hurt too bad to cry (any movement is excruciating.) The "funny" thing is this happens every holiday so I am stuck writhing in misery until I can get in. IT aches so badly. Anyhow just venting I guess.