Re: Serious Concern about my BPD Ex-wife

I had a best friend who was borderline. She loved her exboyfriend to death and mistreated him but it wasn't because she didn't love him. She told me after they were broken up that she misses him and wants everything for him. He eventually stopped talking to her. She said she cheated on him just to tell him and push him away because she was affraid of maybe loosing him or never felt safe being in love. Also a few times she tells me she doesn't care about me, and other days she asks me if I made it home ok when I drive her home. When I ignore her calls she goes apeshit yet she says she doesnt care. These borderline people are the most painful to be around because they sincerly care one day and that allows us to care back. Then another they hate us. My guess is she still loves you sometimes and it might not be about using you for your home to fall back on. You cannot take what they say seriously because they DO NOT HAVE CONTROL and their MIND CHANGES COMPLETELY BACK AND FORTH. She likely does care for you and needs someone like you who is tolerant. She might not be able to tolerate the fact that a marriage can not always be perfect, and borderline people at times will get obsessed with perfection. They always prey on people that are needy that they can control(even though they love them). They play mind games and are smarter than they seem. Tweet