The story you are telling is like a mirror of what is going on here when some people, in an effort to come out of the dark, found such horrible truths about themselves... more than they could take actually. Instead of taking responsability for who they are and work their way out with dignity, they projected it on their environment or 'the messenger'. (This one here should have been thanked!)
Time can help with the healing as long as we are NOT in denial.