Don't give up. She's trying to process what's happening. Maybe she needs more time. She has spent a lont time trying to forget about you. I found my birth mother when I was 30. She was terrified. She ended up in the emergency room with chest pains. Everything you're feeling right now she is also feeling (well, not everything). Mine never told anyone about me so as you can imagine, she was absolutely terrified! She was so angry that the system let her down -- little did she know or ever find out -- I found her illegally! Long story. Wish my three siblings could find their birth parents -- I got lucky . . .
I was also fortunate because I live only 30 miles from her. I called her one day and announced myself and told her I was coming to see her the following day. I never gave her a chance to refuse. If I had to do it over again (btw, I am 46), I would have probably been less in her face. And, when I saw her -- heavy sigh -- I was so disappointed. Oh my -- what an emotional roller coaster!
I am with you . . .
Blessings from Peggy (she named me Lisa -- it has always been my favorite name. I named all my dolls Lisa. When I found out what she named me, oh my).