Cold Sheet Whew!

Wow. Did the cold sheet last night. I do mine alone.
6 cloves of garlic eaten before the bath. I don't put it on my feet, I have a bad burn on them still from last time when the garlic was sitting on my foot in my sleep.

1.5oz 90k unit african bird pepper
1.5oz Powdered Ginger
1.5oz Powdered Mustard
Free floating in the tub.
3Qt's of Yarrow tea(1teaspoon yarrow per cup water)
1qt warm water after the bath


This time was pretty much all lower body. Kept my knee's under and gave my legs a massage the first 10 mins until it got excruciating then I just waited out the last 15. Lasted around 25 minutes in the tub until my skin felt like it was going to melt off.

What an experience. This one was much stronger than my previous one. Was dozing in and out of consciousness trying to focus only on the feeling in my body and nothing else. Didn't get much sleep, everything burned so hot. But I do feel rested now, I know I'll be tired later though. I was shivering at times, but also felt hot and could feel my sweat, it was really odd to have my skin be that on fire and I kept touching myself to check and I didn't feel like I was overheating. I felt like I could raise the temperature of my body with how much I was paying attention to an area. I would feel a shiver move through me, so I would raise the temperature higher. Was interesting in the moment.

I was hallucinating once I got out of the tub and I was feeling so hot once the tea started to kick in I honestly thought I was going to die. Had all of these quick 3rd person daydreams, watching myself fry my brain and die in bed, then coming up on my own body from another perspective. Decided that even if I did die during this, I would prefer to die trying as hard as I could. Kind of a hard feeling for me to explain, but it put me in a really good place mentally for the rest of the journey. Was in and out of consciousness for 4 hours.

Deprogramming the death wish they put into my head when they told me I was HIV+ has been one of my more recent goals. For years, I was so afraid of dying a horrible tortured death from this. A couple of weeks ago I started coming to terms with reality, accepting whatever my fate would be.

My side says 100% chance of a cure. I am doing the incurables plus some other suggested modalities (CE, Cayenne, etc). I am working very hard at it and while sometimes I wonder if I could do more, I realize how much I have been doing for the last 27 days of juice fasting. Regardless of the outcome, I have worked as hard as possible to move in a positive direction.

The doctors camp says that I have a 100% chance of death, so high stakes and not a whole lot of middle ground. Either way, I only have so much control over what is and is not true in this world. As I start putting together the puzzle I am realizing that I'm not going to die from this, its all in my head. Tweet