English from around the world

In a  Bangkok temple:
IT  IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A  MAN. 

Cocktail  lounge, Norway: 
LADIES  ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE  BAR.

Doctor's  office, Rome: 
SPECIALIST  IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Dry  cleaners, Bangkok:
DROP  YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.

In a  Nairobi restaurant: 
CUSTOMERS  WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.  

On the  main road to Mombasa, leaving Nairobi:
TAKE  NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS  IMPASSABLE.

On a  poster at Kencom:  
ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN  HELP.

In a  City restaurant:
OPEN  SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.

In a  cemetery:
PERSONS  ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES.  

Tokyo  hotel's rules and regulations:
GUESTS  ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.  

On the  menu of a Swiss restaurant:
OUR  WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

In a  Tokyo bar:
SPECIAL  COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Hotel,  Yugoslavia:
THE  FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.  

Hotel,  Japan:
YOU  ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE  CHAMBERMAID.

In the  lobby of a Moscow hotel near a Russian Orthodox  monastery:
YOU  ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET  COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY.  

A sign  posted in Germany's Black Forest:
IT  IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE  OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE  TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.  

Hotel,  Zurich:
BECAUSE  OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE  BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS  PURPOSE.

Advertisement  for donkey rides, Thailand:
WOULD  YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

Airline  ticket office, Copenhagen:
WE  TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL  DIRECTIONS.

A  laundry in Rome:
LADIES,  LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD  TIME.