My introversion is getting worse (could it be the mercury?)

Hi - I've had a lifelong problem with severe shyness and introversion. Being an introvert doesn't necessarily mean that you're shy - but, for someone who happens to be both shy AND an introvert (myself) - I think introversion can exacerbate social anxiety (social anxiety is a clinical level of shyness). Well, my problems in these areas have been so debilitating that I have been unable to function at a normal level for an adult (other psychological problems also contribute to my inability to function).

So the last thing that I need is for my introversion to get worse - but alas, that is what seems to be happening. Actually, I think it *has* been happening over the years - steadily and insidiously. But these latest developments really have me worried. Although I've been quite uncomfortable around most people, I have historically been comfortable enough around my mother to hold a decent conversation with her - and I've had a sufficient level of comfort around my brother to produce occassional moments of enjoyment/laughter (as well as decent conversation). Well, these days - my ability to "let myself go" in conversation even around these family members has been impaired. Even if I start to get into a flow of conversation, I become overly-conscious of myself - and that stops things in its tracks. This unprecedented level of self-consciousness has produced additional anxiety (again, the LAST thing I need!) - and I'm distressed that I cannot even relax around my own mother anymore. I seem to have withdrawn deeper into my own inner world of internet addiction and the feeding of my fantasies - and, when my mother, brother, or father enters the room, I often find myself wishing that they would leave as soon as possible so I can go back to being alone in my little world(I've always craved ample "alone time" - but things didn't used to be THIS bad. I used to enjoy and take comfort in my mother's presence at least sometimes.)

I've always been a loner who, for the most part, shuns the company of others (because of the massive social anxiety caused by being around others) - but the little "pockets" of enjoyment that I used to get from limited social contact seems to be disappearing more and more by the day. And I'm having more difficulty than ever in verbalizing my thoughts - the massive self-consciousness and the anxiety prevents words from "flowing" out of my mouth. Instead, I often tense up and speak haltingly, or with awkward stutters. And the quality of WHAT comes out of my mouth isn't (nearly) as good as it would be if my mind didn't seem hellbent on working against me.

Anyway - since I've become aware of the possibility that mercury intoxication could have something to do with my extreme introversion - I'm suspecting more than ever if continued mercury toxicity is just causing a degenerative condition where the "illness" of my introversion/anxiety just keeps progressing. I want to get my Amalgams out a.s.a.p. - but this isn't possible, due to finances. So I'm forced to sit passively while the mental disorders possibly caused/abetted by mercury-intoxication progress. Right now, I'm holding out hope that I will be approved for SSI - this is the way that I plan to pay for my Amalgam removal. But my hearing hasn't come up yet - and it's a "sit and wait" process (please send good wishes my way that I'm approved - I'd appreciate it. :) ). Meanwhile - it's been frustrating to watch my mom spend a large amount of money on home renovations (in desperation, I'm selfishly thinking that she could have used at least some of that money on helping me in my goals of Amalgam replacement/removal. I know she's really not obligated to, nor should I expect her to - but at the same time, it's a frustrating situation). I've talked to her a few times about the possibility that I might be mercury-toxic and that I desire to have my poisonous Amalgams removed - but she doesn't believe in the "theory" of mercury/amalgam-toxicity at all. She doesn't think my Amalgams or mercury intoxication could have anything to do with any of the difficulities I'm living with.

Anyway - I just wanted to share my distress, as well as to seek feedback from others on the issue of introversion. Has anyone else had problems with excess introversion and/or social anxiety (severe shyness)? Did/do you think that mercury intoxication had/has anything to do with your introversion/shyness problems?

P.S. - The Internet, and my addiction to it, might be a factor in making my introversion worse. Would my problem be as severe if the Internet didn't exist? Would I spend some of the time that I devote to my Internet addiction toward more communication with my family? Or would some other "diversion" just replace the Internet? Would I be doomed to progressive introversion, Internet or no Internet?