I am a fruitarian warrior

I am a big time fruitarian. My favorite fruits are avocado, olive, rambutan, cherimoya, mame sapote, durian, lychee, jubube, goji, sapodilla, carambolla, and cherries.

I have definitely been into fruit-- and it is definitely the warrior's diet. My energy is off the shizzle since going fruitarian in 1999.

In addition, I LOVE the Star Trek series, and avidly watch the TV show, and attend as many conferences as I can.

ALso, I love playing the Star Trek role playing game with my 100-sided die. (along with D&D, and Marvel)

I easily get addicted to any fantasy story line. It is like my crack. Just like romantic comedies are crack to women, fantasy is crack for me.

I dream of someday becomming the mercenary, or the villain, or the foe, and sweeping the young maiden off her feet by my deeds of valor that will be sung in legends thousands of years from now. I will be the first knight in 1,000 years that only ate fruit.

I feel like I was born in the wrong century, as if I really should have been a medieval knight, during the days of chivalry and duels, and grand schemes of unification. My signet ring would have had a picture of a stinky durian.

Is this wrong of me? I sweep myself off into great mental adventures, in the coterie of my imagination.

But what about here and now? I feel like that one comic strip. There was an astronomer who looked far off to the skies of distant galaxies. His telescope was in his attic. Each evening, he pursued this glorified lens, to enjoy the grandness of his celestial travels, always escaping, always escaping.

If only things could be better now... The astronomers dream was to solve the problems of the heavens, such as finding ET life, and cosmic intelligent radio signals. He wanted to solve all those problems, and meanwhile his wife was nagging him about all the duties he was neglecting here and now.

So, I have been encapsulated in this warm cocoon. All my little frustrations and worries can be carried off to my books and my role-playing. I'm not the most experienced guy, but why does that matter when all my protagonists can have any woman they ever desired?

I am like the Star Wars kid, in that I always fighting my own imaginary battles. My friend once caught me shadow-boxing myself, complete with sound effects against the dark knight I was combatting as I saw my reflection in the mirror. Eventually, I won, and saved the village, and the fair maidens pledged themselves to me, and paid their respects to me during the night.

I dress in costumes whenever I get a chance, and often visit dance clubs as a Klingon, a Darth Vader, or as an orc. I promenade through various buildings, often wearing a cloak, that is veiling my sheathed replica heron-marked blade. Unfortunately, Holloween is the only night I can only truly be myself.

I dream of overthrowing the Romulans, and vanquishing the Sith. Sometimes, I change roles, so I enjoy the thrill of the pillage. Like an immortal, from Highlander, I have lived a hundred lifetimes, complete in my dreams. I know the touch of a woman, and feel her breath caressing me. I know what it is like, and yet I have never been with one.

I know what is like to behead a man, or a troll, or a worm. I know what it is like to have blue-eyes, and see the world under the spice's influence.

These images are so vivid. My dream is to re-create them into computer graphics and games, so that the whole world can celebrate the victory I have achieved from fantasy.

I want to spread the impact of my imagination to all those who need hope and inspiration, and uplift the human race, so that we can face the new millenium and create a new order of prosperity.

This is my mission statement, and I kiss my sword, swearing these words I have spoken with my blood. So shall it be, evermore.

Am I any less of a man, because I am so swooned by the essence of fantasy? Or am I more of a man, because I have walked hand in hand in countless struggles with some of the greatest heros that have never lived?

In my knapsack I carry grapes, bananas, and kiwis. I plant the lychee tree on all the roads I travel, through the many countries I visit. I am a modern-day Johnny Lychee-seed, spreading the blessings of exotic fruit to all the greatful denizens of the lands I conquer.

I can not help but smile, because I am so happy with the the events I have manifested. Being a fruitarian is the greatest blessing that one can ever experience.

Thank you for citrus!!!

And thank you for hearing my story!!!


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