Question re: widowed acquaintance

An acquaintance of mine lost her husband right after the holidays last year. While I don't know her very well, we became friendly when we met in a chat room for those with similar interests. Eventually, our families did meet. At the time of her husband's death (he died after a long illness) they were raised their 3 grandchildren, which she continues to do. When he died, I sent her a card along with a note expressing my sympathy.

About 2 months after his death, she sent out a general email to all friends and acquantances basically expressing her feelings. It was obvious (and understandably so) that she was feeling both hurt and angry. Hurt because she was grieiving--angry because some people appeared to her to be insensitive. People apparently said things like "I know how you feel. My cat died recently." or "I know how you feel, I'm divorced." Some even told her to get over her loss. I wrote back to her and told her that she shouldn't listen to those who told her she should be over her loss but that she should grieve in her own way and in her own time. I even gave her my phone number and told her to call if she wanted to talk. She never did call and I don't have her phone number. After that, I didn't hear from her for quite some time. She's rarely in the chat room these days and when she is, she sounds more upbeat.

I should add that she has been talking to other widows. What I don't know is if it is in a support group or not.

Now, this past month, she sent out another general email venting her feelings. She said it didn't apply to everyone but she didn't have the time to individually write to us all. In this email, she told us it's okay to mention our spouses but don't go on and on about them. She mentioned that she stopped talking to some people because they hurt her feelings and she told them this when they asked. The response she got was to tell them when she was over it. Her grandkids apparently have had to make new friends because some stopped talking to them when their grandfather died. She does have extended family that live nearby and she has told me that they all have been very helpful to her. Thus some people have told her that she has it easier since she's not alone. She ended the email wishing us all a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.

My question is---I want to email her back but don't know what to say. Somehow Merry Christmas and Happy New Year doesn't seem right. And since she is still very hurt and angry, I worry that I may inadvertently say the wrong thing. Does anyone have some suggestions as to what to write? I don't want her to think I don't care or have forgotten her.