i miss you guys...hope your all doing well. thanks blackngold for your last response i appreciate it a lot
i was doing good for a couple days then went back to a huge binge and purge night. i even wish i was back to restricting calories and purging but i can't even do that...it's a million calories and purge or nothing. ugh . before i had some type of control and i've even lost that. i know i have these problems why can't i control them. god no matter what i do i have this thing in my head telling me i need to starve or if i'm stressed i run to a million calories and throw it up as a punishment, but it just feels so good to be able to get it out and i guess prove to myself i can do it. sorry guys to rample sometimes it's just easy to read thoughts that are written down.