bella12984
hello! i know that you wrote on here for answers but i'm afraid that i can't give you a def. answer on how to stop it all. first you have realize that it's not just the food that is the issue or the weight so of course them feeding you then leaving you obviously isn't going to work (that is the worst thing ever to do with someone dealing with a.n.) and i'm so sorry you went through that. in my opionion e.d. are so complex and deal with major issues and things that range from not only weight issues but from also from emotional damaging situations. it took me awhile to realize that my e.d. "helped" me kind of control my life or at least that's how i view it. stress also plays a huge part of my e.d. and the more stressed i am the more i feel the need to control things. also the fact that there is so much pressure to look beautiful and small an eating disorder kind of just happened. not really eating anything to everything and getting it out of me wasn't glamorous but at least for the first time in my life i was in control.
so first honestly i would tell you to try and think really hard and honestly what your eating disorder "does" for you or helps you control or anything along those lines. from there the healing process can begin. i have found that writing on here and listening to people has really helped me. am i cured.......no but it helps and it gives me honestly a reason to control my e.d. and i think it might do the same for you, but again you would have to elaborate a little more. i know it's hard but we are here for you. oh, really quick i wanted to tell you to look up as much as you can about e.d's.... it sounds so cliche but i look up websites every night. you get to learn a lot about them and also people that deal with them. not everything is true but search through....it can help learn a lot about yourself.
also to help control the b.n. side of the battle you are going through while you try and work some things out i would look up raw food diets and light cardio exersize programs. i've learned a lot and if i eat healthy and organic the way i'm supposed to i am ok with keeping it down. i can help you a lot with that if you want.
i just wanted to explain to you how am coming to learn about my own e.d. so that maybe you will be able to lean about yours. i wish you well and feel free to ask any questions.