ITA taking a lover would be unfair to your wife. I wouldn't like it if my hubby cheated on me :(....i dont think he will as we have a sex life lol
Why dont you and your wife remain friends..but seperate for a while? She may come to her senses and see someone about it rather than lose you for good
Only take a lover if your seperated :)

Hi DeeAnn:

I definitely have not decided to take a lover into my life. I’m trying to see all of my options and trying to see what the outcome would be if I chose any one of them. Some of the things I’ve thought about are really wild. They’re so wild, you wouldn’t believe me even if I told you. In fact it would probably shock you.

I think it’s going to take me quite a while to make up my mind to do anything. There are so many paths to choose from, and so many realities to enjoy, or be stuck with.

I know some men don’t like to be around kids. Just like some people don’t like broccoli. But I know there are many men who do like kids. I think kids are wonderful, I would never say that kids wouldn’t make a difference. They certainly do make a difference. I wish I had a house full of kids. If it weren’t for kids, this would be a pretty dreary world to live in. It’s the kids of the world that give life meaning and spontaneity, and excitement. I know, they can ruin your perfect plans. And sometimes they can drive you to distraction. But kids can give your life such joy and perspective. They’re amazing.

If I choose to get a divorce, I would start looking for someone else to be with. And one of the things I would be looking for in a woman, would be a woman who had some kids. Of course I’m about 10 years older than you are, so it would be much harder for me to find someone than you. But I would still look. You never know.

Small towns are great, I grew up in a small town. I don’t know where “God’s waiting room” is. I think I live in a different part of the country. Lately I think I live in “the devil’s pizza oven”. :)

Don’t give up on finding someone, there’s a guy out there looking for someone just like you. You’re a very warm and caring person, I can tell. And you have a terrific personality, I can tell that too.

I don’t agree with you about men having it easier in finding love than a woman with kids. Everything I’ve found, leads me to believe just the opposite is true. I have a friend that’s looking for a woman. He’s a pretty decent guy. He works out and takes care of himself. But I’ve heard of some of the problems he’s run into. It seems that every woman he finds, wants someone that’s perfect. He’s not perfect. He has some flaws. Basically, he’s just an ordinary kind of guy. But he’s been looking for over two years and he can’t find anyone. Maybe that’s just because he is who he is, I don’t know. But I think a woman has an easier task of finding someone to love. On the other hand, maybe that’s just because I’m a man. :)

Take care,
T