Is this a permanant arrangement between the ex and his mother or does she need a place to stay? If she doesn't have to stay there then I feel that it definately is wrong on his mothers behalf but if she needs some where to go and has no where else..then I can understand his mother. Of course jealously does play apart, but why shouldn't it? You have every right to feel that way!!! My suggestion is talk to his mother or have him talk to her and find out what the deal is. If he has no plans on getting back with his ex...then he needs to tell her that what she is doing is wrong and that she should move on...good luck :):) could you respond to dreamer75??? boyfriend/church...thats me :)

You, your boyfriend and the baby constitute a family (or, maybe I should say...household, only because you are not married), but, because he is the father, he has the right and even the responsibility to tell others not to interfere,intrude, or impose themselves on your relationship and household. It is his ex and mother that he has to protect his child and girlfriend from. How is he going to learn to be a good, responsible father if other people get in the mix and do whatever they want? The mother and the ex are WRONG (BIGTIME). The ex is very wrong because she decided to cop-out and leave your boyfriend's child MOTHERLESS instead of repair the relationship (I know you don't want her to repair the relationship, that's not what I'm talking about). I'm saying that she DUMPED (abandoned) her own child, she is a traitor to her own blood(I can't continue to comment on that in public, but, you get the idea), and now she wants to play "good person". If the mother wanted to do the right thing for the child, she would understand that (maybe your boyfriend could explain that to her). Anyway, there is not much that you yourself can or should do to improve the situation, Your boyfriend is going to have to take charge and be the "LEADER" (which is what a responsible father needs to be anyway). The mother may actually have the child's welfare at heart because she has "pipe" dreams about the child growing up to be the "perfect person" (there is no such thing), but she also has to respect the wishes of the father, or doesn't she both love AND respect the father. It is not for you to even feel that you should have to take matters into "your" hand, the father should be taking care of the situation. Talk to your boyfriend. He is going to have to put his foot down, take charge and kick the ex out of the house (she has NO right to see any more of the child than he chooses, she abandoned the child). If he explains this "properly" to mom, he might gain a very good "ally" against the ex. Whenever anyone accuses you of being "just" JEALOUS (or "just" ANYTHING), it means that, ...NO MATTER WHAT, they just want you to FEEL GUILTY because you are responsible for something sinister. Being "JUST" jealous is like being "JUST" curious, jealousy and curiosity are attitudes, NOT reasons. Of course it's not true that you are JUST (only) JEALOUS, but they want you to believe that and be on the DEFENSIVE. You are OBJECTING to the "hanging around" and meddling of the ex because you have a good "motherly" instinct. Tell your boyfriend to "take charge" of his child and his (and your's) household. Tell him to be FIRM, but to do it wisely because the ex is self-righteous (she abandoned the kid) and MIGHT even try a court battle for custody (get the mother on your side).