When my mother attempted suicide, I had just turned 14. I attempted it 18 months later - age 15. My brother completed the act when he was 34 (I was 32).

I have tried for years to figure out where this madness comes from.

My family seemed fine until my older sister went to a very, very elite and expensive college(I was 12 when she left). In her socializing back in the late 60s, seances, palm reading, and other forms of the occult were considered the going thing. She became very involved with the occult, had visitations, and had seances, supposedly in a room where a man had committed suicide. Through a seance, this supposedly dead person advised them to not commit suicide, as there was "no place to go."

As I have continued to grow as a Christian (baptized age 33) and "work out my salvation with fear and trembling", I have come to what I feel is the best understanding of these types of situations. This matter is such a deeply spiritual issue. "...but the dead know nothing." (Eccliastes 9:5 The Clear Word). If the dead know nothing, then what was it that communicated with my sister in her seances and visited her? We have attended a Christian congregation that believes that these visitations and "communications from the dead" are none other than evil spirits sent to deceive. Legally this spirit had a right to attach itself to my sister, as she was not a Christian and she, in essence, invited it in. She, in turn, brought it home to the family and infected us with it. That is when the problems began in my family. My mother also proclaimed that she wished this situation was happening to her instead of to my sister, thereby inviting the evil spirit into her life. What she should have done is plead the blood of Christ over the situation and asked Him to deliver us from this evil. Instead, it went on to destroy family life as we knew it and estrange family members from one another even to this day.

Derek Prince, a Christian evangelist, teacher, writer and devout man of God, gives other insightful instances into this type of situation. You can do a google search and find some of his works, as well as order books, tapes, etc. His book "Blessings or Curses" gave me more insights.

It is true that chemical imbalances can play a large part in this drive to try to end one's life, but I believe the root problem is spiritual. If we are being sensitive to God's spirit, His still small voice will lead us away from the things that are causing a chemical imbalance, maybe not overnight, but eventually, to restore harmony with Him. This chemical imbalance can appear to be caused by the wrong diet, substances that impair our functioning, stressful situations that throw our chemistry out of balance - you name it. But for me, the root cause still remains a spiritual one.

If anyone needs any prayer regarding this type of struggle in their lives, please e-mail me. I will be happy to intervene for you in the name of Yeshua.