I am so sorry that you experienced such betrayals, and it is never "obvious" that anyone posting online is typing from experience.

Did you ever get help? Were you able to engage in counseling therapy to help you to process those events? Did the abuser/rapist ever face charges or were they ever reported? Were you ever able to forgive your parent(s) for their bad decisions? These are questions to contemplate, not really respond to.

Sometimes, things happen to people that never should, particularly children. The dynamics of domestic violence and abuse are very complex and, even for survivors, often incomprehensible as to "why" anyone would allow themselves, or their children, to be so dreadfully harmed. It goes deeper than what we are able to see on the surface.

So, having typed all of that, it might be a really positive option to contemplate engaging in strong and intensive counseling therapy to put these episodes and events into their proper places so that you can go on and live a balanced life.

For myself, I wish that I had done this before I ever had children, myself. It took over half a century of living in a state of absolute misery before I took my first steps on my individual Healing Path. I was angry, bitter, fearful, resentful, and envious as a result of the dynamics in which I was raised - and, subsequent relationships. My decisions were always based upon fear and I wish that I had known more about all of this, earlier on.

Brightest blessings to you