I feel incredibly guilty about having adrenal fatigue! I repeatedly tell my fiancé that he deserves better than this life with me (he is perfectly healthy).

We didn't get a lot of "normal time" together before I became sick (less than a year) - but he has been so supportive! He tells me that I shouldn't feel guilty for being sick, which is always nice to hear but... At the same time, his support increases my guilt. The more parties, dinners, and trips that he misses out on... the worse my guilt becomes. He doesn't mind staying in with me most of the time, but I want him to go out with friends and be normal too.

I think a huge part of it is that we had a life together before my adrenal fatigue where we went out every weekend with friends, we were always traveling, and just free to do whatever. We definitely had to rewrite all expectations!

My husband and I both have AF and are doing NB together. In some ways it's easier doing it together. We can empathize with each other. In other ways it's difficult. We sometimes share the same low energy, bad day. I'm not really sure there is an ideal situation when it comes to AF.

My partner is very understanding luckily. He's got used to going off an enjoying himself without the expectation of me joining him.

I've given up accepting invitations as i never know how i'm going to feel on any given day.
It's quite annoying not being able to plan anything. After a while you get used to it, and used to letting people down!

I've come to the conclusion that those friends that are still around despite this are true friends and those that fall off the radar i'm better off without!

Yes. The past 2 years I've had to "not go" on many trips of social outings and my husband weant alone.

It's ok. I know he wishes Icould go with him, but most of the time I am not up to it.

And, my symptoms can change that quickly too from being a bit better for a week, than feeling bad the next week. So I never committ to anything.

I will miss going to his high school class reunion again too. It also is at night and often runs late, so this is not good either, as I need to start winding down for the evening by 8pm.
I am glad he can go and enjoy himself.

When it comes to having unpredictable energy and not being able to commit to activities outside the house, it is really helpful to remember to be gentle with yourself.

Remember that you aren't trying on purpose to ruin a trip by backing out at the last second. Know that you aren't trying on purpose to make your partner miss out on family events. When you don't have the energy and health to do something, step outside of yourself and see yourself as a concerned friend would see you. You would have compassion on yourself, and you'd say, "Hey, you! You are such a fighter, such a brave and strong person. You do everything you can (and then some) with the energy you have, but you don't need to overpush yourself. Be gentle to yourself."