silver mare
what a lovely daughter, your mother would be very proud. I am sorry you lost her, and she sounds like she tried to fit a lot into her life, including having you. I am sure she wanted a few more years to be with you. She is with you every single day, always remember that. She really would want that, and I have a great child a bit, well a lot older than you, and I have scleroderma, and its all I want from him is to not be sad when its my turn, but to remember the life we shared. Its my biggest fear to see him sad, I fear it more than scleroderma. My family is messy too hun, but my child and I are very close. The pain your mum went thru towards the end, she is free from the ugly disease. But she will never be free from you. A mother's love is eternal. You go be a good rhuemy, and live the life you want to live, big hugs.