Its hard doing the Incurables alone(... 
Vernal
15 y
1,487
I'm sorry to complain, and I know I should be grateful since I'm making progress in about one month's time. I am grateful some of the time and other times I feel sorry for myself a little. Perhaps my biggest problem in life is loneliness. This has led to a big part of my Depression and anxiety, and even my adrenal fatigue because feeling lonely would cause me to abuse myself with food or even just staying up online when I should have been sleeping. In doing the program now, and especially implementing things which make me feel more alive(translation: hot/cold showers) it brings up a lot of feelings, such as feeling alive which can be great, and also painful feelings. It also points out, sometimes vividly, how depressed I really have been for a long time, and how I have only been existing and not living. I knew that for a long time but its just that when you gulp hot pepper and come out of a cold shower the feelings are more intense, the realizations more in your face.
Some days I wonder how I can keep going, doing more cleanses, fasting, taking on more challenges of the IP program when I feel so devoid of someone to be close to and share my life with. It gets hard in practical ways, such as always juicing alone and cleaning up and shopping and planning the program. My brain fog has made me forget to take things, one day I left my place with a container to bring IF#2 with me and then later realized I had forgotten to actually put the powder in the container. Being alone and struggling with the work of it, which feels overwhelming at times, is frustrating because I know that if I had help I could be doing the program better and progressing faster. But the real hurt is just being alone and missing the main thing that life is about--sharing and loving. So this also makes me miss out of much of the joy of life. I shouldn't dwell on all this because I know there are others with worse physical illnesses and challenges. But since this is a huge and all-encompassing part of my healing challenge I can't help but talk about it. I know that much of my state of dis-ease is that I have been alone for a long time, isolating myself and finding it hard to get what I need with others. I do feel if I can stick with what I'm doing now that I will be better socially and give myself a chance of meeting someone. Not long ago I felt embarrassed by my condition and didn't feel worthy of anyone. But I wonder how I can stick with it for a long time while living in the void I feel day after day.
I actually placed an ad at craigslist looking for others doing Natural Healing or Shulze/Christopher, or anyone who wants to heal this way, etc. and not one person responded. I may try to start a support group for it in my local area, but its hard to find the energy to organize it and I will begin working soon.
Is anyone else lonely here? As far as doing EFT for Depression or emotional stuff, I did that many times and seldom felt much effects. I am not that patient and some told me I might need to just keep doing it for several hours a day. I honestly feel that if I had someone in my life it would change a lot.
On a practical note, is it feasible to do the cold sheet treatment by myself? Sculze says just grab someone from your local health food store and do it together. Doesn't seem so easy to find someone for that.
Sorry if this is a downer for anyone. I have been flat the last few days, I stay in bed til 9:30, feeling too tired to get up sooner, even though I go to bed about 11 or 11:30. I have some good hours but do feel generally depressed, sometimes exhausted, and well-I know the loneliness affects every cell of my being. But I will stay the course, and to anyone wondering about trying the Incurables program or any part of it I think it will help you tremendously. If you have a partner to do it with how can you not get started? The rewards will be obvious very soon.
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- Healing thoughts & options :) Re: It... unyquity
15 y
1,988
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This is a reply to # 1,407,236Advertisement
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'Top of the mornin', Vernal!
I'm sorry to complain, and I know I should be grateful since I'm making progress in about one month's time.There's no need to apologize for seeking help in healing! And healing our emotions and our "personalities" is JUST as important as healing our physical bodies. We're trinity beings (body, soul/mind/personality, spirit) - we must honor & heal ALL of ourselves, not just part of ourselves :) I am grateful some of the time and other times I feel sorry for myself a little.A "little" pity party every now and then is something we all expect/encounter (maybe even enjoy :::grin:::), eh? Perhaps my biggest problem in life is loneliness. This has led to a big part of my depression and anxiety, and even my adrenal fatigue because feeling lonely would cause me to abuse myself with food or even just staying up online when I should have been sleeping.Cool deal - you know what "it" is...loneliness can be healed, just like cancer or anything else! YAY :::insert typical disclaimer here...IF you're willing to do what it takes!:::: (dontcha just hate that disclaimer sometimes!) In doing the program now, and especially implementing things which make me feel more alive(translation: hot/cold showers) it brings up a lot of feelings, such as feeling alive which can be great, and also painful feelings.GREAT! emotional "flow" is JUST as essential to our healing as physical flow. It also points out, sometimes vividly, how depressed I really have been for a long time, and how I have only been existing and not living. I knew that for a long time but its just that when you gulp hot pepper and come out of a cold shower the feelings are more intense, the realizations more in your face.Yes indeedy, that's what it's all about - bringing all the "owies" to the surface, detoxing from their poisonous selves, and then getting down to healing, changing and restoring.
Some days I wonder how I can keep going, doing more cleanses, fasting, taking on more challenges of the IP program when I feel so devoid of someone to be close to and share my life with. Ahhh yes, the great 'rock & hard place'. If I don't do all these emotionally & physically healing protocols, no one will be my partner...but it seems impossible to do them without a partner. Okee-dokee Vernal, because of love & truth & healing, I'm going to remind you this first. Dr. Schulze says, "After decades of healing work in the my clinic, the one thing that is for sure? Sympathy never healed ONE person". So I don't want you to think I don't understand (and that I haven't been lonely or don't know how "empty & awful" it feels...I just no for sure that throwing a big ole sympathy blanket your way won't help you one little bit. Let's (all) get to work on HEALING ourselves emotionally :) It gets hard in practical ways, such as always juicing alone and cleaning up and shopping and planning the program. All that is surely true...and it's also true that "perspective" is a good thing. It would be harder to heal if you couldn't afford to BE juicing; it would be harder to heal if you were the lady in CA that can't ingest anything by mouth; it would be MUCH harder to be in 'Wings's shoes and barely be able to lift a glass or get up ONE stair while homeschooling & feeding 4 children (and dealing with an extremely non-supportive spouse) AND doing all your juicing, shopping, planning and cleaning up alone, TOO. My brain fog has made me forget to take things, one day I left my place with a container to bring IF#2 with me and then later realized I had forgotten to actually put the powder in the container.Lol, I've done things like that! I just spent over 45 minutes frustrating/working on a high enema, called Rocky in to help (which I don't particually care to do), and after HIM working with me 15 minutes (holding the back higher, trying to adjust the tubing so the stupid water would flow) - it became apparent that I'd forgotten to run the water down the tubing before I inserted the tubing. Dude! :) At least you didn't didn't forget your IF#2 with your naked butt in the air and a tube hanging out!! :) Being alone and struggling with the work of it, which feels overwhelming at times, is frustrating because I know that if I had help I could be doing the program better and progressing faster. Vernal, it's true - sometimes the 'work of it' IS overwhelming & frustrating (and it's natural to be overwhelmed and frustrated - and to post for support)....but what really matters? Are you going to DO it?! Are you going to choose LIFE?! Yes!!! Yes you ARE doing it! And yes you ARE choosing "life". And you've come a LONG way already...and I (nor anybody else), is going to let you fall back into old "toxic" habits, patterns and mindsets! The way out? FORWARD! Don't let the dimness of the tunnel take away from the brilliancy of the end result. Don't you do it!! Forward into the healing or backward into the dimness - that's your choice. I know you've made the right choice, and I know you can do it!!! But the real hurt is just being alone and missing the main thing that life is about--sharing and loving. You know, I agree...sharing and loving is VITAL to my existence. But I didn't always have someone to share and love with either. I was married from 18-28 to a man I adored...I sacrificed my colleged education for him (he was/is a true genius). and after moving to a distant state away from everyone I knew and loved...he came out of the closet and left me....in 1988 with over $120,000 of debt (and no degree). I felt like my entire world was like a card that someone had sent me...the cover had a picture of the dawn, and it said on the front: "I know things are really bad & lonely for you now, and your world is in a shambles. But remember, it's always darkest right before....(open the card) ...IT'S PITCH BLACK!" :( :( :( And it was pitch black for a long time...UNTIL I decided to do something about it, and did it. So this also makes me miss out of much of the joy of life. Yes, it is "anti joyous" to be lonely. That's a fact for sure. What counts is...what are you going to DO to heal it? I sure hope everybody that reads this, suggests ways for you to "heal loneliness" - because there are many. And when you respond to this post, I ask you to post FIVE things you can do to start reaching out to others and bringing them into your world, so you can have friends and find the loving mate you deserve. My first suggestion: Be a "Big Brother" - not only will you help a child in FAR worse condition than you, that will make you feel SO worthy and improve your self-esteem SO much. We gals really don't care so much about looks - but we care VERY much about "depth" (which you have in abundance); compassion (another fantastic attribute you offer constantly); that he will respect us (obviously, you've got that virtue!)... and we need to KNOW that he can keep us safe and protected. To heal your 'lack of a mate' loneliness, develop the attributes to prove to a woman that you CAN keep her safe & protected...'just like 'wings is painstakingly beating down ALL adversity and developing her muscles. You can do it - yes you can. I shouldn't dwell on all this because I know there are others with worse physical illnesses and challenges. But since this is a huge and all-encompassing part of my healing challenge I can't help but talk about it.Talking about it good, just be sure not to ruminate in it :) Instead, talk about it; identify it, and get to work fixing it. I know that much of my state of dis-ease is that I have been alone for a long time, isolating myself and finding it hard to get what I need with others. If you & your doctor within know this to be true, then it's time to make a plan and work the plan. I do feel if I can stick with what I'm doing now that I will be better socially and give myself a chance of meeting someone. Cleansing and restoring your body, will go a LONG way toward healing and restoring your emotions. But when there's long term emotional issues, they need to be focused upon as well. Not long ago I felt embarrassed by my condition and didn't feel worthy of anyone. But I wonder how I can stick with it for a long time while living in the void I feel day after day. By making yourself MORE WORTHY! Start "giving" NOW. Look into being a 'Big Brother' - look in the Yellow pages and find the closest nursing home, and GO there...and just hold hands and listen to those precious, wise souls share their stories. Find out where you can volunteer - Vernal, exactly the way you are right now...YOU ARE NEEDED! There are hundreds of people that need you - they're just waiting for your support. If you reach out to them, your own worthiness will grow a hundred fold...and you just might meet others that are doing the same :)
I actually placed an ad at craigslist looking for others doing Natural Healing or Shulze/Christopher, or anyone who wants to heal this way, etc. and not one person responded. I may try to start a support group for it in my local area, but its hard to find the energy to organize it and I will begin working soon.That's cool you did that, awesome even. Good for you. Too bad nobody responded - I think it's a victory that you tried!
Is anyone else lonely here? As far as doing EFT for depression or emotional stuff, I did that many times and seldom felt much effects. I am not that patient and some told me I might need to just keep doing it for several hours a day.EFT is VERY effective, but you have to do it diligently and you have to do it with 'insight'. Soon I'll be do an EFT post to explain how to use this wonderful tool more effective.I honestly feel that if I had someone in my life it would change a lot. :::insert game show "wrong answer buzzer sound here":::: Reverse that to: if you would change yourSELF alot, you would have someone in your life. It's just like healing the physical. Identify the disease (which you have); then learn what it takes to reverse the disease; then do what it takes. I know you want to do this - I know you want to take charge & control of your future, and I know you CAN make it happen. The solution and the healing are for YOU to find and accomplish - this is NEVER about somebody else, it's always about US.
On a practical note, is it feasible to do the cold sheet treatment by myself? Sculze says just grab someone from your local health food store and do it together. Doesn't seem so easy to find someone for that. You really need somebody with you in case you 'overheat', dehydrate or start having muscle spasms.
Sorry if this is a downer for anyone.It's not a downer to ME! I think reaching out for help and 'laying it on the table' means you're looking for ways to heal! That's a GOOD thing!!!! I have been flat the last few days, I stay in bed til 9:30, feeling too tired to get up sooner, even though I go to bed about 11 or 11:30. I have some good hours but do feel generally depressed, sometimes exhausted, and well-I know the loneliness affects every cell of my being.Vernal, one of THE hardest things in life to do, is to motivate ourselves when we don't have a purpose or a reason to motivate ourselves :( It's true, when there's noone depending on us, it hard to find a reason to "move". The answer - put yourself behind the 8 ball and get in a position where people WILL need you - and when you go there and help them, you WILL be motivated to help them again. What in the WORLD do you think motivates Rocky & me to keep trying to get all the foundational files done, when we keep getting more "buried" in back posts to answer every hour? Somebody out there NEEDS us. But not one person on all of CZ (or none of the people I've helped) would have EVER needed me/us, if I hadn't made the first step and offered/committed to helping THEM. But I will stay the course, and to anyone wondering about trying the Incurables program or any part of it I think it will help you tremendously.Good for you, Vernal! If you have a partner to do it with how can you not get started? ::::game show buzzer sound again:::: Honestly Vernal, it's generally the people that HAVE a partner that have the toughest time on the IP. It is TRULY rare in this world, for someone to have married early and both people 'grow equally' out of 'The Matrix' and "sheepledom". When you read the SYL manual and watch the videos, you'll hear Schulze talking CONTSTANTLY about getting rid of the negativity of a spouse that doesn't believe in natural healing. Speaking of which...The rewards will be obvious very soon....the rewards WILL be more obvious more "very sooner" if you get started on the emotional aspects of your healing. Vernal I need you. In the next couple of days, I'm going to making a post that says I'm going to stop posting for 3-5 days. I really need you to do something for me (I didn't know who I was going to ask, but now I know "it's you"): Every day, I need you to watch one of the videos (free online) from Dr. Schulzes Natural Healing Crusade, and make a daily post about what was most impactful to you about it - and then encourage others to watch it and add what was most impactful for them to the thread. I'm serious here, this is NOT a "pity assignment" (lol), me & the future of this forum really do need your help.I'm going to get some sleep - I sure hope to see a "healing response" to my request when I wake up - that'd bring a HUGE smile to MY day :)
Unyquity
P.S. And oh yes, just wait'll you get to the liver flushing - you'll purge a boatload of emotional junk!!
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- Hey Vernal...Re: Healing thoughts & ... healinginHiswings
15 y
1,629
RR
This is a reply to # 1,407,352I'm kinda giggling after reading your post and Uny's response, because I think I told her EXACTLY the same thing!
Truth: You AREN'T "doing the IP alone." I'm doing it, Tierra and Hummingbird Sage are doing it, Donnarose/Cali Girl is starting it, a couple of the guys are going to start in June.
Truth: It's a heck of a lot of dishes and laundry to wash plus bathroom to clean, etc if you're doing it by yourself. I bet I complain to Uny about the dishes every single day. You COULD get some Dixie cups and just throw them away. Harder on the planet, easier on you.
Truth: You're so busy doing all this stuff, and you don't feel like anybody is going to appreciate you. You aren't getting the atta boys IRL. Well, get them here! You wanna know is impressed with you (and everyone else) doing the IP? ME. Because I KNOW how hard it is to keep motivated when you're facing strong headwinds all the time.
Quit? Are you serious? You've already come too far for that. You drank the Koolaid, dude. lol
Truth: You've got old emotional garbage/toxins coming up. Cool beans! Tough to go through, boy, do *I* know. You'll have all KINDS of memories, teen traumas, broken heart scenes, arguments you remember, burying your favorite dog, negative tapes your parents told you come to the surface. You'll also have some great memories come up of when you were a champion, a winner, a great success. You greet them and release them.
You'll have old memories of GREAT (bad) food come up, too. Like yesterday I wanted a hamburger made with mayo SO BAD!!! I can't remember the last time I ate a hamburger ordered with mayo, but there is this place here in town that has THE BEST greasy spoon old fashioned grilled hamburgers. I mean, these are heart stoppers. I drank my organic apple juice with Superfood like a good little girl and in about 15 minutes I was disgusted with mayonnaise again. :-)
Lonely? *smirk* Listen, Vernal- "she's" out there. YOU have a job to do right now. YOU have to become who your destiny calls you to be. You're going to be fit, tanned, confident, successful, joyful, funny (from all those jokes we're supposed to learn), fun to be with (from all the active sports and "playing" you'll be doing), and sexy (I promise). "The One" is going to be so fantastic you won't even believe you could attract somebody like that. You'll have women falling all over themselves over you in a year. DO THE WORK, DUDE.
You know what I'm doing? Kinda pretending I'm an athlete in training. Sometimes it's a lonely road to the top. But how bad do you want to get up there?
Feed the Warrior, Vernal. :-)
Wings- Oh YEAH! "FEED THE WARRIOR!" AWESOME... unyquity 15 y 1,195
- Re: Hey Vernal...Re: Healing thought... Vernal
15 y
1,412
This is a reply to # 1,407,722Advertisement
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Wings,
Thanks much for this response.. it makes sense to me what you say here and I agree. I was not thinking, at all, of quitting, though I just lament the harder elements, or worry about being able to make it. When healing begins it brings up the exact crap that was holding me back in the first place, and that is a lot to work through. But I liked the way you phrased it, and thanks again!
- Re: Healing thoughts & options :) Re... Vernal
15 y
1,450
This is a reply to # 1,407,352Advertisement
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I ready your(Uny's)response after getting up this morning, which was ten am. I felt lousy, groggy. I go back to sleep after I first wake up, feeling so tired; but it seems to make me feel even worse so I will try to get up early from now on. Anyway, I had a hard time reading your response, for various reasons which I won't go into now. But then later I had my second BM of the day and felt better. I get more depressed when I'm constipated and I think its especially important to be having those BM's now with taking the IF#2 and fasting, etc. So I was feeling stuck because I was literally stuck. But I also had a hard day yesterday, was going through a process of gettting back to work. I don't have a car so I had to take six buses and do a fair amount of walking. An activity day can stress my adrenals, but this was hard because the job wasn't working out and I got frustrated.
I am actually deeply in debt now, and am only buying the foods and tinctures with borrowed money, and money I am not sending to my bills for now. My credit has taken a hit and I owe an ex-girl friend $6000. As for helping others, I know what you mean and its good advice, but I feel more of a need to make some money and perhaps help some people like this ex who is out of work herself and I already owe her money. But I may be able to try to do some service to others at the same time. But I feel very stressed over not knowing how to pay the bills next month, etc. The job I was preparing for may not pay enough to survive on and I may be forced to take a different one which I know is very minimal also. But the reason I began juice fasting and the IP is because I was desparate. I think its desparation that draws people to the program, and in a way that is good because it gets you to do it. I felt that even if I used up what little money I had I may not be able to make it otherwise, as my health was declining and I did not want to go on anti-depressants.
I don't want to feel sorry for myself anymore. I want to take charge of my life and be productive. For me right now I wish I could find a way of making an income or develop something which will do this. I would love to work in healing others in some way, whether its natural healing or some type of emotional work. I originally went to college for this but after divorce I got derailed, long story. I feel that if I can get truly well I would like to find a way to help others do the same. Unfortunately I do need to earn now, as I would rather not just ignore my credit cards. I would like to pay them off and THEN IGNORE THOSE BANKS.
Uny, I will do anything you ask, as far as looking at the videos and writing about them, or anything else. I do want to make a contribution.
- Hey Vernal...Re: Healing thoughts & ... healinginHiswings
15 y
1,629
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- Re: Its hard doing the Incurables al... ginger4jeff
15 y
1,326
This is a reply to # 1,407,236This is the third time ive sat down to read your post Vernal! Everytime, I wanted to start reading it but I knew I didnt have enought time to really take it all in and so I wanted to wait till I could.Finally : )
First of all Im not going to say "I understand", cause I dont really. Ive been happily married since 18, but im just starting into all this natural health stuff and while my husband isnt opposed, im trying to make everything seem totally normal and cool so that hes accepting of it. So Uny/dr.Schulze are right when they say it can be harder when your doing it WITH someone.Just think, you can get all these programs under your belt and accomplished and be ready to be with someone. They are going to have to except your new way of life as there getting closer to you! And you may even be able to help her become the person she wants to be.Last night I read the cayenne files Uny sent me, I only finished half due to time. But after I felt like I was exploding with excitement. Like I just wanted to scream from the roof tops what I just learned.I did get to share a little bit this morning with my husband but not as much as I would have liked. You have the opportunity to find someone who feels the same way as you. Yes it may take some time.But right now its time to heal you and concentrate on you.Do what you can to reach out and you never know what might come along, when your not expecting it!
Our problems do seem to dominate our lives and we just soo wish to be other people but I know that if everyone here put all there problems into hat and passed it around and pulled out someone elses problem, they would put it right back!! WHY? Because our problems are what we know, we've been dealing with them most likely our whole lives.So Count your blessings...us being one of them <3 ~emeAdvertisement
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- Re: Its hard doing the Incurables al... naturalgirl
15 y
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This is a reply to # 1,407,620Advertisement
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After reading all the replies I have to say, "Wow" each one is so full of truth that we can all learn from.I know I needed to hear/read what was said.
I pretty much agree with everything that has been said and could not say it better I know you can do this and guess what you have come so far! Money issues are very hard and adding lonliness and health issues that you have to resolve alone, well it can get pretty discouraging at times.I am not divorsed but I can relate to the feeling alone on the journey to health. You can always post here and we will be here as much as we can and sure its not the same but it is something.
I know right now its so hard to even feel like there is a light at the end of the tunnel but there is. You are as you put it "in special company" on this forum and its so true. In all the years that I have been wandering Curezone I have never see such truth and love and "real advice as I have seen here. This is it and you found it! Just be sure to keep us updated!
- Re: Its hard doing the Incurables al... naturalgirl
15 y
1,388
- Healing thoughts & options :) Re: It... unyquity
15 y
1,988
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