I really do understand your trepidation, but getting herpes doesn't have to be the end of anything.  When I found myself back dating after divorcing the wife that I got it from, I didn't avoid dating women who didn't already have it. Oh, and no the divorce wasn't about herpes.

In dating, I tended to tell prospective partners well before it became an issue due to impending intimacy and none of them ran away. I'm now married to a woman who doesn't have herpes, as proven by blood testing. We avoid risky contact if I'm having symptoms and usually use a condom since it covers the area where I seem to usually have outbreaks.  It's been several years now and there's still no problem.

The thing about telling is to do it in a fairly matter of fact way without getting too emotional about it and include it in the overall STD discussion that you should be having anyway.